In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?
With the dawn of industrialization and urbanization, a decrease in the population of organisms, both animals and plants has been observed. I narrow the causes down to two severe environmental problems: global warming and deforestation. Forcing people to use alternative kinds of transportation and decreasing consumption of animal products curbing the effects of these problems which have the potential to save various species of flora and fauna from the blink of extinction.
Global warming gives rise to a decrease in quantities of creatures. To clarify, global warming provokes extreme weather conditions like scorching hot summers, impossibly heavy rainfall and brutally cold winters and in turn, raise the temperature and worsen air and water quality which
cause
a decline in a large Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
number
of species as the most basic conditions of their survival are endangered. logging is another reason for this
reduction. In other words
, this
problem gives birth to frequent flooding owing to soil going loose. furthermore
, This
disaster not only reduces the number
of habitats,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
endangers the survival of human life.
The first solution is for the government to urge society to use alternative methods of transportation in order to reduce carbon emissions. fostering the habit of cycling for instance
could be a go-to method. The Netherlands have adopted a systematic approach by forcing citizens to cycle making this
country a greener nation without any endangered living things. Moreover
, the folks and government need to work in tandem to decrease meat and dairy consumption. Animal agriculture is the most excessive land-use system on earth, making it a top driver of desertification. Beef production is a good example which is responsible for a staggering 41% of logging. So, if the community use fewer animal products, the planet will have a greater number
of green forests and beasts.
In conclusion, global warming and deforestation play important roles in the reduction of huge quantity
of flora and fauna. Forcing the public to cycle by the government and limiting the consumption of animal products can curb the decreased Fix the agreement mistake
quantities
number
of creatures.Submitted by negin.nematbakhsh on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay provides a well-rounded response to the task, demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic. However, it would be even better if you could give more specific examples relating to the question. For instance, in the second paragraph, you could mention specific species that are in decline due to global warming and deforestation.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates good coherence and cohesion. Your ideas are logically organized and you have used a range of cohesive devices. However, in some parts, the transition between ideas could be smoother. Try to make sure your sentences and paragraphs link together smoothly. Also, avoid using repetitive phrases.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite