Governments should spend more money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is said that governments should prioritize investing in train rail rather than highways. To come up with
this
, I think focusing on public Linking Words
transportation
systems will be a good idea since they affect humanity in a positive way; Use synonyms
however
, spending money on roads will pollute the environment.
The main effect of working on roads as a way of Linking Words
transportation
is that it will end up as litter in cities. There are a lot of people who use cars and motorcycles as their individual vehicles which release significant amounts of carbon dioxide and carbon monoxide into the atmosphere that are harmful to humans. Use synonyms
For example
, a research team from the Institute Technology of Surabaya (ITS), Indonesia which majoring in environmental engineering wrote in their paper there are 46% of citizens in Indonesia suffer from asthma Linking Words
due to
exposure to these pollutants.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, the solution is to use public Linking Words
transportation
like the train, Use synonyms
that is
why the government should upgrade by investing in the infrastructure. Linking Words
Although
train systems produce harmful gasses, railways have more capacity to fit the number of passengers. Linking Words
Consequently
, it can reduce not only pollution in the air and land but Linking Words
also
can reduce congestion. Linking Words
Moreover
, railways will be more efficient for workers and pupils who are afraid of coming late because railways do not have any obstacles and are on time. Linking Words
For instance
, independent studies have shown that the majority of people in Jakarta, Indonesia, approximately 58% love using trains during working time and Linking Words
also
university student of ITS says in their paper that railway Linking Words
transportation
helps lower polluted air.
In conclusion, regenerating funding of government to railway development is one of a way to create a better place for the future. I totally believe it can create less pollution and prevent traffic congestion. Use synonyms
In addition
, the living standard of society will rise up.Linking Words
Submitted by heyyo
on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good flow and logical structure; however, it would be beneficial if you made use of more linking words and phrases to ensure smooth transitions between your ideas.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion were present and generally well-constructed. Do ensure that your conclusion adequately summarises the main points of your essay. These conclusive paragraphs have the power to end your essay on a powerful note or leave lingering questions.
supported main points
You did well to support your main points with specific examples; however, the examples could be further expanded upon for a higher grade. Including a comprehensive explanation of your examples to firmly convince and engage your reader is crucial in high-scoring essays.
complete response
You've addressed the topic and provided your views clearly; however, the argument could be enriched with a more diverse range of ideas. Explore other aspects of the topic to provide a more comprehensive response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas were clear, but they could be more comprehensive at times. Remember that complex ideas need to be broken down into comprehensible segments so that your reader can easily understand them. For a higher score, work on presenting multifaceted ideas in a clear, easily digestible manner.
relevant specific examples
It's good that you've included specific examples to back your points. However, your examples would carry far more impact if they were more relevant and comprehensive. The clarity and relevance of your examples have a direct influence on the strength of your arguments.