Many people believe that home-cooked meals are better for one’s health. Those who disagree argue that it is healthier to eat restaurant meals. What’s your opinion?

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It is often argued that home-prepared
foods
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are healthier for human
health
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,
while
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others argue that
restaurant
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meals are more healthy.
This
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essay agrees with the former statement;
although
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restaurant
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foods
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are easy to access and less time-consuming, homemade
foods
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are full of nutrients and have various
health
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benefits. On the one hand, there are some
individuals
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who find
restaurant
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food
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less
time consuming
Add a hyphen
time-consuming
show examples
because of easy access and budget-friendly nature;
as a result
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, fast
foods
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are getting
popular
Correct quantifier usage
more popular
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day after day.
For instance
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, in many developing countries
such
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as the USA, almost half of the people prefer
restaurant
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food
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rather than home-cooked meals, as per BBC News.
Therefore
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, many
food
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companies
such
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as Burger King, McDonald's, and Pizza Hut are getting more franchises and are followed by more people.
On the other hand
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, despite the many positive aspects of
restaurant
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food
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, it cannot meet the nutrient value of home-made
foods
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.
Moreover
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, home-prepared
foods
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have many
health
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benefits; many
individuals
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experiencing unwanted weight gain, heart diseases, and many more
health
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problems can be managed with a balanced diet.
For example
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, a research study done by HAMS Hospital in Nepal shows that with proper counselling and diet information, almost 10% of the
obesity
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obese
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patient rate decreased.
Thus
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, I believe home-cooked
food
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has many more benefits, and all people should follow healthy
food
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habits. In conclusion, despite the many advantages of
restaurant
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food
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for working
individuals
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, home-prepared meals are more beneficial for all.
Therefore
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, I believe the higher authorities should implement
health
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campaigns to promote healthy habits among the public, and
individuals
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should
also
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work on themselves to maintain their
health
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.

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task achievement
Clarify the differences in nutrient values between homemade and restaurant meals more explicitly. This will reinforce your argument.
task achievement
Ensure that your examples support your claims effectively and are relevant in context.
coherence and cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures and lengths for better flow and more engaging reading.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use clearer transitions between points to enhance logical progression in your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear opinion and structure, with well-defined paragraphs making it easy to follow.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples and data to support your opinions, which strengthen your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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