The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The use of social
media
is replacing
face
-to-
face
interaction
among many people in society. The phrase contains advantages more than disadvantages
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
will be illustrated below . Reduced
face
-to-
face
interaction
among many people in society, because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
usage
. The disadvantage can be explained by an example that happened in my life .I have a friend who interacts
me
Change preposition
with me
show examples
every day and
update
Change the verb form
updates
show examples
me daily by using social
media
.
This
habit has become routine in our daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. After
Add a comma
somedays,
show examples
somedays
Correct your spelling
some days
show examples
he felt
a
Change the article
an
show examples
eye irritation and he met a doctor , he informed him that his
eye sight
Correct your spelling
eyesight
show examples
was damaged severely because of over
usage
of
mobile
Correct pronoun usage
his mobile
show examples
phone.
Then
we decided not to interact daily. so
this
proves the
face
to
face
Correct your spelling
face-to-face
show examples
interaction
has been replaced by social
media
.
The social
Correct article usage
Social
show examples
media
usage
is much better than wasting time on
real time
Add a hyphen
real-time
show examples
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
. The
face to
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
face
interaction
may cause time wastage .
The social
Correct article usage
Social
show examples
media
can make a
meeeting
Correct your spelling
meeting
between two
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
without any cost .Any way
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
usage
reduces
the
Correct your spelling
face-to-face
show examples
face
to
face
interaction
it can be acceptable and it has
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
more than
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
. If a person has
an
Change the article
the
show examples
ability to work in a BPo company
that is
located in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
by using online meeting applications, we can work from India itself.
This
will
benifit
Correct your spelling
benefit
for the BPO company more than the person .
Finally
Add a comma
Finally,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
concluded that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages . By comparing the advantages and disadvantages of social
media
. Community’s feedbacks
Submitted by insighttribez on

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task response
The essay addresses the topic and presents arguments for the advantages of social media replacing face-to-face interaction. However, the disadvantages are not thoroughly discussed. It would be beneficial to present a balanced view by acknowledging and discussing both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
The essay has an introduction and a conclusion, but they could be more developed. The logical progression of ideas in the essay can be improved by providing clearer topic sentences and organizing the paragraphs more cohesively.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary and includes some relevant terminology related to the topic. However, there is room for improvement in using more precise and varied vocabulary to enhance the clarity and effectiveness of the arguments.
grammatical range
The essay shows a satisfactory level of grammatical control with some errors. There is room for improvement in using a wider range of sentence structures, avoiding repetitive structures, and ensuring consistent verb tense usage.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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