It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advanatges of taking risks outweigh the disadvanatges ?

#people #risks #lives #advanatges #disadvanatges

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The

twenty first

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twenty-first

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century has been marked as the epoch of human opportunities, especially when it comes to building a career and living your own

life

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. Some

people

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tend to take a

risk

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whereas

Linking Words

for others it seems unconscious. There are certain benefits and drawbacks which will be discussed below. Living without taking

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risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

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might be beneficial for some

people

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, even if they have

opportunity

Correct article usage

the opportunity

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to do so.

Monotonous

Correct article usage

A monotonous

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and stable

life

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does not mean boring for

people

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if they see any advantages of

following

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

lifestyle. Building a career in one organisation, receiving all social benefits and planning a family

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

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usually related to

life

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without sudden movements and extreme activities. Not only

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people

Add a missing verb

do people

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try to avoid possible changes

Add the word(s)

, but

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they

also

Linking Words

plan everything carefully in order to keep their

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life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

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calm.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, without taking a

risk

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is difficult to realize your ambitions. Getting a new position abroad might give you a lucrative job in the future, which means there will be some changes to make. Adrenalin

are

Verb problem

is one

show examples

of the things which push

people

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to activate their dreams and plans.

Moreover

Linking Words

, some

people

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participate

Change preposition

in extreeme

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extreeme

Correct your spelling

extreme

sport

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sports

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and

then

Linking Words

come up with the idea of setting up a new business.

In other words

Linking Words

, sometimes

risk

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is an

essantional

Correct your spelling

essential

in order to achieve your goals. I would like

to conclude

Linking Words

by saying that, there has to be a balance between following a

lifestyly

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

with taking risks and

to be

Change the verb form

being

show examples

Add an article

an undecisive

the undecisive

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undecisive

Correct your spelling

indecisive

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person.

Submitted by fatemah221027 on Tue Oct 31 2023

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task response coherence

The introduction and conclusion are present but need improvement in clarity and relevance to the topic. Work on improving the logical structure of the essay to ensure better coherence and cohesion. Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your main points and enhance the clarity of ideas.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

242 words

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advanatges of taking risks outweigh the disadvanatges ?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

More and more movies are being released directly onto streaming platforms, like Netflix and Disney Plus, rather than being played in cinemas. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the reasons? What could be done to solve this problem? You should write at least 254 words.

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by a very small number of people. Some people say that governments should public money on saving these language, while others believe that would be a waste of money. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.