The given bar chart illustrates how many male and female played six different sports in English city during 2012.

The given bar chart illustrates how many male and female played six different sports in English city during 2012.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The given bar chart illustrates how many male and female played six different sports in English city during 2012.
The bar chart demonstrates the number of participants who took part in six different
sports
Use synonyms
in one of the cities located in Britain throughout 2012 broken down into females and males.
Overall
Linking Words
, male participants were overwhelmed by female
players
Use synonyms
in
sports
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as badminton, and swimming. Other than those, the roles were reversed as the number of male
players
Use synonyms
had taken over in tennis, cycling, football and hockey, Looking at the bar chart for more detail, regarding tennis, cycling, and hockey
players
Use synonyms
, they shared a whopping 10 to 15 % difference when comparing the number of men and women respectively. More surprisingly, the similarity
also
Linking Words
appeared in
sports
Use synonyms
that women had taken over
such
Linking Words
as badminton, and swimming.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, football was overly dominated by male members as not only it was the vast majority of male
players
Use synonyms
but
also
Linking Words
it was 3 times compared to female members. On top of that, when comparing the total numbers of
players
Use synonyms
, all 5 kinds of
sports
Use synonyms
were taken by storms compared to hockey
players
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
it only took nearly 15 % in males and 10 % in females.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, such".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sports, players with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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