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Writing Samples
Band 8

In many countries schools have severe problems with student behaviour. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

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Introduction
Schools in many countries are becoming increasingly concerned about poor student
behaviour
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.
Although
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this
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 issue has several causes, I believe the main reasons are emotional neglect, weak parental
guidance
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, and the growing pressure placed on young people.
However
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,
this
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 problem can be reduced through better emotional education and stronger support systems at school and at home.
Body · 1
One major cause of bad
behaviour
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 is that many
students
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 lack the emotional skills needed to cope with stress appropriately. Young people today face constant pressure that can negatively affect their mental well-being. Without proper
guidance
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, frustration and insecurity are often expressed through disruptive
behaviour
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 and disrespect toward others. In many cases,
students
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 are never taught how to process emotions in a healthy manner, causing them to react impulsively when faced with difficulties.
Furthermore
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, insufficient parental involvement frequently worsens the situation. Children who grow up without emotional support or supervision are more likely to develop unhealthy behavioural patterns because they lack stability and direction.
Body · 2
To address
this
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 issue, schools should place greater emphasis on emotional development alongside academic achievement.
For example
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, emotional awareness programmes could help
students
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 better understand how to manage stress and communicate more effectively. Access to school counsellors should
also
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 be improved, particularly for
students
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 struggling with personal difficulties. Equally important is the role of parents, who should provide consistent
guidance
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 and create supportive home environments where children feel understood rather than ignored.
Conclusion
In conclusion, student misbehaviour is often rooted in emotional struggles and insufficient
guidance
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 rather than simple disobedience.
Therefore
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, by strengthening emotional support both at school and at home, societies can significantly improve student
behaviour
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.

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task response
Add one more real or clear example to make your ideas stronger.
task response
You answer both parts well, but you can explain the solutions a little more.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow, but you can link some ideas more smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
Some points are general. Add one small detail in each body part.
task response
You answer both questions in the task clearly.
task response
Your main ideas are clear and stay on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are in a good order and are easy to follow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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