Many men and women are making the decisions to have children later in life. Why is this trend occurring? What are the impact of this development on both family and society? Give reasons for your answer and include examples

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It is true that more people
prefered
Correct your spelling
prefer

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to get hitched and have
baby
Add an article
a baby

The noun phrase baby seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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later in their life. Even so, most people can experience both benefits and drawbacks to
have
Change the verb form
having

The verb have may be in the wrong form after the preposition to. Consider changing it to the gerund form.

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child
Correct article usage
a child

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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subsequently
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

in their creations. I will support
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

view with arguments in the following paragraphs. Nowadays, many humans think that having
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

later is
good
Add an article
a good

The noun phrase good thing seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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thing because our child wants to stand out from other
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. These
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

have a more developed outlook.
Furthermore
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, young families believe that they are not yet ready for
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

a thing and to make a career. They want to have
well paid
Add a hyphen
well-paid

It seems that well paid is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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and permanent
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs

It seems that job may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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before progeny and women aspire to maintain their external beauty. Sometimes, in
such
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

cases
Add a comma
cases,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase in such cases. Consider adding a comma.

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people are afraid and prepare themselves for
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

to adapt to
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

viability.Family environment is
aslo
Correct your spelling
also

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a factor.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, parents spend less time with their young ones. On the one hand, there are some positive influences
to
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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families.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, parents
expend
Verb problem
spend

There may be a verb use issue here.

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a lot of time with their
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. They prepare lessons, play various games,
go
Correct word choice
and go

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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walks together. Good employees for the government will develop . He has a good relationship with his guardian.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, do not do anything without their permission ,
respects
Wrong verb form
respect

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb respects. Consider changing it.

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them,
first
Correct word choice
and first

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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and foremost
is
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb is appears to be unnecessary here.

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not
to
Fix the infinitive
apply

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

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speak loudly to them.
Besides
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

have a wider role to play in our family. In conclusion , each group has their own response and they can choose their personal life. Before making a decision, they should consider carefully all positive and negative outcomes
their
Correct pronoun usage
they

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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choose
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task response
The essay does not fully address the task prompt. It lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. The ideas presented are not comprehensive and lack specific examples to support the arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks coherence and cohesion. There is a lack of logical structure, with ideas being presented in a disorganized manner. The introduction and conclusion are not present.
lexical resource
The lexical resource of the essay is weak. There are several instances of incorrect word choice and limited vocabulary. The essay also lacks variety in sentence structures.
grammatical range
The grammatical range of the essay is limited. There are numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, incomplete sentences, and incorrect word order.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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