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Band 5

Some people believe that new technologies like mobiles kills social interaction . Do you agree or disagree ?

#people #technologies #mobiles #interaction
There is an underlying assumption that in the contemporary era up-to-date devices, like smartphones can do harm to the social connection between
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
.
However
, there are not only demerits in using modern gadgets
,
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apply
show examples
 but
also
 some hidden benefits which I am going to explain
further
. First and foremost, it is a common misconception that cutting-edge smartphones only kill social bonds. It gives chances to
people
 interact from all over the globe. To exemplify, it is simply impossible for the dearest and nearest
people
 to keep in touch who have recently moved abroad for different purposes
such
 as studying, working or looking for another life. It seems that 100 years ago letters could not be delivered from Japan to South Africa
due to
 the lack of technological advances.
Moreover
, there are social media platforms
such
 as Facebook
Wats up
Correct your spelling
WhatsApp
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, Instagram and many others which may be helpful when someone has lost, it ought to be the fastest way to beg for help.
On the other hand
,there are some drawbacks which lead to many issues in socialising between
people
, especially in teenage groups. It seems that
people
 have been becoming couch potatoes day by day. They are only socialising through phone calls or surfing the Net. Unfortunately, it leads them not only to social problems in real life
due to
 the absence
"face-to-face"
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of "face-to-face"
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 contact
,
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apply
show examples
but
also
 to health problems like obesity and high blood pressure. In conclusion, in the modern world, it is absolutely necessary to use state-of-the-art phones to socialise with each other.
On the contrary
,
due to
 the aforementioned
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,
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it needs to be balanced and no harm in social life would have been done.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • face-to-face communication
  • instant messaging
  • social skills
  • nonverbal cues
  • distractions
  • notifications
  • social media
  • echo chambers
  • diverse perspectives
  • social connectivity
  • online communities
  • transcend
  • social integration
  • remote areas
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