Some people think young people should follow the traditions of their society. Others think that they should be free to behave as individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that

youngest

Correct article usage

the youngest

show examples

are supposed to follow the traditional

culture

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

others reckon that they should maintain their own characters and personality. From my perspective, both tradition and personality are essential during the progress of our society.

To begin

Linking Words

with, traditional

culture

Use synonyms

is a significantly integral part

Change preposition

show examples

our community because we can learn something important from it, which may show

Use the right word

show examples

cultural confidence and convey

Change preposition

to us

show examples

valuable spirits.

For example

Linking Words

, there are numerous stories from which we have learned persistence. Following these inspirations, we can shape a better character.

In addition

Linking Words

Use synonyms

culture

Replace the word

cultural

show examples

heritage

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

us to conserve. Traditional

custom

Fix the agreement mistake

customs

show examples

and artworks are symbols of our unique cultural confidence. It is necessary that we do our best to

inherit

Verb problem

preserve

show examples

the

traditions

Use synonyms

so that they can be profound.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, we have the right to be ourselves and possess

own

Correct pronoun usage

our own

show examples

stylish

Use the right word

style

show examples

. What’ more,

culture

Use synonyms

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

innovation

Use synonyms

and vitality so that it can be developed and inherited better.

For instance

Linking Words

, some traditional

costume

Fix the agreement mistake

costumes

show examples

is old

Verb problem

are

show examples

fashion and complex. As long as people infuse their

innovation

Use synonyms

and add some modern factors, the clothes will become more fitted and fashionable for young people

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

then

Linking Words

it will attract more and more individuals.

Therefore

Linking Words

, integrating individual designs and personality is an excellent way to cater for public aesthetic and inject momentum

Change preposition

into

show examples

traditions

Use synonyms

. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

traditional

culture

Use synonyms

is fundamental,

innovation

Use synonyms

is essential. Both

them

Change preposition

of them

show examples

are indispensable.

Innovation

Use synonyms

can infuse vitality and energy

Change preposition

into

show examples

traditions

Use synonyms

so that the

traditions

Use synonyms

are able to be disseminated more widely and be inherited for a longer period of time.

chunyanh502

Nov 4, 2025

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task response

In the intro, state your view clearly. The reader should see your stance in the first line.

task response

Give more clear and full examples to back your points. Use simple real life ideas that fit the topic.

coherence

Your main ideas go in order. Topic sentences could be stronger to show the point each paragraph makes.

coherence

Use link words to move from one idea to the next, e.g., also, in addition, but, as a result. Keep sentences short and simple.

grammar

There are many small grammar errors. Check noun forms and verb use. For example, 'young people' not 'youngest'; 'heritage' may be hard; 'culture needs' -> 'culture needs'.

content

The essay keeps the topic in mind and gives two views.

structure

There are three clear parts: intro, body on tradition, body on modern self, and conclusion.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural heritage
Sense of identity
Cultural background
Community unity
Formative years
Significant meanings
Passed down
Creativity and innovation
New ideas and perspectives
Societal progress
Personal growth
Self-discovery
Outdated or irrelevant
Adhering to traditions
Meaningful and relevant

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