In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved.

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The percentage of
animals
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and
plants
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has gone down in these years. Personally, I would say that climate change and the worst treatment of
animals
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cause that problem.
Hence
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, to investigate that matter we need more comprehensive care of
animals
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and
plants
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with conditions that forbid the use of fire in the
forest
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.
This
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essay will discuss that I feel that for two reasons which I will explore in the following essay.
Initially
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, one commonly cited problem is that society ought to be aware and have entire knowledge regarding how to treat the
animals
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and
plants
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in the public gardens in the
forest
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,
also
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in the zoo.
For instance
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, these troubles happen when a group of humans have been visiting a certain
forest
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, and they smoke and leave a cigarette behind the plant. Throughout that, the fire burned and contributed many damage
such
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as killing
animals
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.
In contrast
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, other sorts of birds migrate to other places . Despite
this
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, there are a number of significant solutions
such
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as the government imposing an amount of money on humans if they smoke in a jungle or in the
forest
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.
Moreover
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, that will mitigate
this
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decline in animal and plant rates.
For example
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, The UK has its own privacy policy on how to treat
animals
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and
plants
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to maintain their welfare.
To conclude
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, it is frequently said that the figure of
animals
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and
plants
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has decreased because human beings have a little bit of knowledge involved in that matter,
I
Correct your spelling
In
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my opinion, the international law of
animals
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and nature, should impose a tax on people who are experience a worst act.
Submitted by alihafiid on

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Task Achievement
Task Achievement: The essay managed to meet some demands of the question but it could do more by ensuring that the ideas are well developed and deep. Although the essay gave reasons on why the numbers of animals and plants are declining and suggested solutions, it wasn't very clear and comprehensive.
Coherence & Cohesion
Coherence & Cohesion: Paragraphing was evident and main ideas were organized but lacked clear progression and linking of ideas was a little faulty. Try to use more cohesive devices to connect your ideas better.
Lexical resource
Lexical Resource: Read, practice and learn synonyms. Using the same words/phrases over and over again makes the essay quite monotonous. Try to diversify your vocabulary more.
Grammatical range
Grammatical Range: The essay contains some complex sentences but there is room for improvement. Be careful with your syntax and sentence structure. Try to vary your sentence structure for a better impact on your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • urbanization
  • deforestation
  • agricultural expansion
  • pollution control
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable practices
  • overexploitation
  • invasive species
  • conservation
  • quarantine measures
  • eradication programs
  • public awareness campaigns
  • habitat destruction
  • climate change
  • natural habitats
  • species decline
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