“Public libraries should only provide books and should not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. Do you agree or disagree?”
The question
whether
Change preposition
of whether
books
should remain the main focus of public libraries
has long been a subject of debate. Public spaces have little
resources available and some may argue that it is not fair to waste them on high-tech Correct quantifier usage
few
media
. Although
it is correct to limit a library
own expenses, Change noun form
library's
libriarians
should reinvent their spaces in order to keep them popular. 61
Not so Correct your spelling
librarians
longa
ago, public Correct your spelling
long
libraries
where
fundamental to Correct your spelling
were
different
Add an article
a different
type
of people, from the student needing to consult encyclopedias to the retired man who just wants to read the daily journals. Nowadays, Fix the agreement mistake
types
due to
social media
, libraries
risk to become
outdated and useless. Change the verb form
becoming
This
is why it is essential to modernize these spaces. High-tech media
can enhance the library
experience in various ways. Through a public computer, the visitors can view the library
's catalogue or use programs to study or for their projects. Videos or DVDs can be used for educational purposes too, and make the library
accessible to visually impaired people.
The use of high-tech media
in public libraries
can be extremely useful but it should be a balance between books
and new technologies. A library
is supposed to be a quiet and peaceful place, where people can lose themselves through arrays of books
. Too much tecnology
in Correct your spelling
technology
this
enviroment
can ruin the experience. Correct your spelling
environment
Therefore
, it is critical to find a middle ground between the old and the new, without erasing the past.
In conclusion, public libraries
should modernize themselves with high-tech media
but there should be a balance between books
and technologies. Additionally
, the limited resources should be used wisely.Submitted by rizzi.flavia99 on
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task response
You have addressed the task adequately and presented a clear argument. However, your examples could have been more relevant to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay follows a logical structure, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, you could improve the cohesion by using more linking devices to connect your ideas.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is generally appropriate. To further enhance your lexical resource, consider using a wider range of vocabulary and exploring different word forms.
grammatical range
Your grammatical range is sufficient, with only minor errors. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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