Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development ?
A large of number physically disturbed
people
are aiming to comeround
using different medications and Correct your spelling
come round
compound
treatments
instead
of consulting traditional specialist doctors
. I think It's not a positive way of treatment. There is a high risk to be
sick Change preposition
of being
more
after following these non-scientific methods.
Correct quantifier usage
apply
Firsty
, most of the time the Correct your spelling
First
villegers
are the main customers of quack treatment. On top of that,Correct your spelling
villagers
remarkable
number of city-dwellers are Change the article
a remarkable
the remarkable
also
falling in
the trap. Sometimes, a gang of wicked Change preposition
into
people
using
religious faith to treat serious Wrong verb form
use
patients
which can lead to death as the system is not scientifically proven. Furthermore
, there are some people
who convince the
normal Correct article usage
apply
people
telling
false stories about themselves as they become cured using Change the verb form
to tell
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
alternative
medicines. Most of the alternative
medicines are not made at laboratory
or testing centres. Those are not proven Fix the agreement mistake
laboratories
also
to cure someone totally.
Rephrase
apply
On the other hand
, usual doctors
have at least a specialization or medical degree. They completed studying case taking, anatomy, physiology, hepatology and many other courses. They have practical knowledge of treating various patients
. Additionally
, the way of their treatments
are
scientifically proven. Change the verb form
is
Besides
, they have surgical knowledge what
is unknown to the so-called Correct word choice
that
alternative
doctors
. Moreover
, most of the usual doctors
are specialized in their fields. cardiologists never treat the patients
of neurology. Usual
Change the word
Usually
doctors
are cautious about diagonosis
with different tests which can help to mark and treat the problem easily and properly.
At Correct your spelling
diagnosis
last
, I must cofess
that, Correct your spelling
confess
alternative
medicines and treatments
are not effective as treatments
of usual doctors
. It is obviously a negative practice which makes the
Correct article usage
apply
people
fool. Only usual Correct your spelling
doctors doctors
doctors'
Correct your spelling
doctors'
doctors
' treatments
can be called as
positive improvement for the Correct your spelling
a
patients
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task response
The essay addresses the prompt but lacks a clear opinion. It is important to clearly state whether the development is positive or negative and provide supporting reasons throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear overall structure and the ideas are logically organized within paragraphs. However, there are some grammar and punctuation errors that affect the flow of the essay. Proofreading and editing is recommended to improve the coherence and cohesion.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary and there are some good word choices. However, there are instances of repetition and the use of some phrases could be improved. It is advisable to vary vocabulary and use synonyms to enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range
The essay shows a good control of grammar with generally accurate sentence structures. However, there are some errors in subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and prepositions. Careful proofreading and reviewing of grammar rules will help improve the grammatical range.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.