It’s more important for school children to learn about their local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

#it’s #school #children #history #world #disagree？

Nowadays, it is essential for children to learn the

history

. There are 2 kinds of

history

: local

history

and

world

history

. Learning the local ones is more important

thanl

Correct your spelling

than

learning the

world

ones. Personally, it is undeniable to say that local

history

is important, and students need to learn it.

Howeever

Correct your spelling

However

, it is

also

important that kids learn their

world

history

. There are reasons to support

this

claim.

To begin

with, the importance of the

history

will remain in them, and

this

realisation helps preserve the

history

. The survival of

people

today cannot thrive without the former generations, whose strong belief has made us all today. Since

people

are from different areas, they are not alike.

Thus

, learning

history

makes

people

know those differences, and they will be capable of understanding other

people

due to

learning

world

history

Additionally

, students will be able to learn the

mistakes

that have been

done

Verb problem

made

show examples

by the ancestors;

consequently

, they can prevent those

mistakes

and not

attempting

Wrong verb form

attempt

show examples

to repeat the same

mistakes

again in the future.

This

means

Change preposition

that

show examples

kids learning

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

history

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will benefit our

world

as they will make our

world

better without repeating the

mistakes

being

done

Verb problem

made

show examples

in the past. In summary, it is true that local

history

is important, but they should

also

learn about the

world

history

. As

people

are living in the

world

together, understanding each other is something that

people

should know.

Therefore

, kids should learn how to understand and respect other

people

In addition

, they will not repeat the same

mistakes

owing to learning the

history

Submitted by dondollaraus on Sun Nov 05 2023

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Task Achievement

Make sure to clearly state your opinion on whether local history is more important than world history in the introduction.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that there is a clear progression and logical flow of ideas throughout the essay. Use appropriate transitional words and phrases to connect your ideas.

Lexical Resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to add more precision and variety to your writing.

Grammatical Range

Pay attention to sentence structures and grammar to improve accuracy and coherence.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It’s more important for school children to learn about their local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can the government do to reduce the amount of waste produced?

Computer and A.I technology being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience. Is this a postitive or negative development?

Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are most successful. Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are most successful. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, marriages are arranged by the parents but in other cases, people choose their own marriage partners discuss and give your own opinion.

Directors of large organisations receive much higher salaries than ordinary workers. Some think it is necessary, while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.