It’s more important for school children to learn about their local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

#it’s #school #children #history #world #disagree？

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Nowadays, it is essential for children to learn the

history

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. There are 2 kinds of

history

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: local

history

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and

world

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history

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. Learning the local ones is more important

thanl

Correct your spelling

than

learning the

world

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ones. Personally, it is undeniable to say that local

history

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is important, and students need to learn it.

Howeever

Correct your spelling

However

, it is

also

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important that kids learn their

world

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history

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. There are reasons to support

this

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claim.

To begin

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with, the importance of the

history

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will remain in them, and

this

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realisation helps preserve the

history

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. The survival of

people

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today cannot thrive without the former generations, whose strong belief has made us all today. Since

people

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are from different areas, they are not alike.

Thus

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, learning

history

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makes

people

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know those differences, and they will be capable of understanding other

people

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due to

Linking Words

learning

world

Use synonyms

history

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Additionally

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, students will be able to learn the

mistakes

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that have been

done

Verb problem

made

show examples

by the ancestors;

consequently

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, they can prevent those

mistakes

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and not

attempting

Wrong verb form

attempt

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to repeat the same

mistakes

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again in the future.

This

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means

Change preposition

that

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kids learning

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

history

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Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will benefit our

world

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as they will make our

world

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better without repeating the

mistakes

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being

done

Verb problem

made

show examples

in the past. In summary, it is true that local

history

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is important, but they should

also

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learn about the

world

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history

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. As

people

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are living in the

world

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together, understanding each other is something that

people

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should know.

Therefore

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, kids should learn how to understand and respect other

people

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In addition

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, they will not repeat the same

mistakes

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owing to learning the

history

Use synonyms

Submitted by dondollaraus on Sun Nov 05 2023

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Task Achievement

Make sure to clearly state your opinion on whether local history is more important than world history in the introduction.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that there is a clear progression and logical flow of ideas throughout the essay. Use appropriate transitional words and phrases to connect your ideas.

Lexical Resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to add more precision and variety to your writing.

Grammatical Range

Pay attention to sentence structures and grammar to improve accuracy and coherence.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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It’s more important for school children to learn about their local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

Your opinion

Some people think that violent sports such as martial arts and boxing should be banned from international competitions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Most people take interviews to select a person for a job. What are the other ways? What do you think is the best way to recruit new employees?

Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix the problem.

Some people think that the education system should only focus on preparing students for employment, while others believe it has other important functions. Discuss both sides and then give your own opinion.

In many countries crime rates among teenagers are higher than among other groups.What are the causes for this problem and what can be done to solve this?