Directors of organizations receive higher salaries than the ordinary worker, some people think it is necessary while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many think that it is not fair for simple employees to be paid less than executives in an organization;
however
, I think that managers must get higher salaries because of their
experience
, and
also
there must be a motive reason for ordinary
workers
to keep them productive in their positions. On the one hand, managers, executives, and those who have been adopted for significant occupations are likely to be highly educated and experienced individuals. Indeed, they have dedicated many years to attaining either theoretical or practical
experience
in their professions, which makes them eligible for higher wages.
Moreover
, these chief executives own decision-making abilities and problem-solving skills, which are fundamental qualifications and might be helpful in critical situations in which an organization might stuck. In Germany,
for instance
, many companies request senior directors to manage the issues happening in different stages as there is a growing thought of schools that their
experience
causes them to foresee and handle matters in a way that ordinary
workers
are not capable of.
However
, ordinary
workers
are probably less educated or recent graduate individuals, which makes them improper options for fundamental job positions in a company
due to
low
experience
and unpreparedness. Generally, a person is appointed in less critical posts, gains
experience
gradually, undergoes trial and error, is a witness to critical issues happening in his workplace, and
finally
will be prepared for delicate situations. In Japan,
for instance
, younger generations are trained to serve as experienced workforce, getting help from their senior supervisors and directors. They are informed that their current training time will lead them to have a better post and a higher payment in the future. In conclusion,
although
some people believe that equal payment for both directors and ordinary
workers
appears to be fair, I am inclined to believe that senior
workers
are more qualified and must be paid higher salaries
due to
their level of skills and number of abilities.
Submitted by mojgan.sobhani on

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task response
Although your points are fairly clear, you could further develop your opposing views section for a more balanced discussion. Try to extend your arguments against high executive salaries to better justify those who think it is unfair. Expanding this part will provide a more rounded argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized, but some transitions could be smoother to enhance overall readability. Pay attention to the logical flow of ideas. For example, ensure that the transition between discussing managers' qualifications and the situation of ordinary workers doesn’t seem abrupt.
task response
You've made excellent use of specific examples like those from Germany and Japan to back up your points. This effectively strengthens your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is clear and sets up the discussion well, and the conclusion aptly sums up your position while referencing the points made throughout the essay.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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