Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes and effects of this problem, and suggest some possible solutions

There is no denying the fact that
children
Replace the word
childhood
show examples
obesity
is a critical
health
problem in some countries.
This
essay will discuss the causes and the possible effects.
Also
, we will provide some suggestions to decrease
this
issue.
To begin
with, there are many causes of
obesity
among the children.
Firstly
, bad eating habits
such
as junk
food
and soft drinks.
Secondly
,
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
the metabolism
due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of exercise and
sedentary
Correct article usage
a sedentary
show examples
lifestyle.
In addition
, play computer games
instead
of going out and playing physically. These causes may impact negatively on
health
and increase the risk of serious medical diseases
such
as diabetes or cardiac problems. These
health
issues may raise medical costs and consume a large number of staff and equipment. In terms of solutions, we can start by creating awareness among families and schools. It is
also
possible to say that prevent schools from providing junk
food
and ask the families to prepare their meals at home. Encourage exercise and offer sports classes like football or basketball that will help them a lot to be healthy and fit.
Moreover
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should limit fast
food
advertising and replace
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
with healthy
food
.
Furthermore
, doctors or nurses can apply
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
small clinic in the primary
health
centre to educate the children who
diagnosed
Add a missing verb
are diagnosed
show examples
with
obesity
and
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
parents have to be involved. In conclusion, there are many resources for
obesity
in childhood and it has a huge effect on their lives. It is
also
true that we can prevent these habits and change children’s lifestyles

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a logical order. Connect ideas between paragraphs to enhance the overall coherence of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Add a more concise and succinct introduction and conclusion that clearly state the main points and purpose of the essay.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more varied and appropriate words/phrases. Aim for precision and clarity in your choice of language.
grammatical range
Pay attention to verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structures. Vary your sentence lengths and structures to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical skills.
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