There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

At present, youngsters face a huge stress to be successful in education, so an array of masses say that modules regarding other
skills
instead
of academics like studies on physical and cooking activities, need to be demolished from school's curriculum because
then
, students can spend more time on academics. I strongly disagree with it because pupils should get a balanced education from school including how to improve their personal
skills
.
Therefore
, I will examine what would happen if those were extracted from the syllabus. First of all, in order to balance the stressful minds of younger people, subjects which teach them about the importance of physical wellbeing should be included, because doing exercises for the body can uplift health.
For example
, if children who are stuck in tuition classes and college get the chance to exercise at least during the time period of
this
subject, it can relax their busy brains.
Thus
, modules which can improve the body fitness of kids need to be present in schools.
Moreover
, kids should be taught how to perform general tasks so that their individual talents can be improved. Having said that, learning those fields can support them to have independent lives in future because
then
they become capable of doing more general tasks.
For instance
, if a child studies how to cook at college who does not have time at home to learn from his family, it would be a huge benefit for his future success.
Hence
, learning modules which will improve personal
skills
will be a huge advantage for students during their life to come. In conclusion, subjects which are not categorised as academics
such
as fields which can upsurge the health status and children's
skills
are really important to be included in the school's syllabus.
Therefore
, I strongly believe subjects like cooking and body training should not be peeled out from colleges.
Submitted by tlakshani005 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a logical flow of ideas.
task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to support your main points.
lexical resource
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and ensure your sentences are grammatically correct.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • pressure
  • succeed
  • academically
  • non-academic
  • physical education
  • cookery
  • school syllabus
  • concentrate
  • academic work
  • well-rounded
  • enhancement
  • practical skills
  • balanced education system
What to do next:
Look at other essays: