Topic: As well as, making money, business also have social responsibilities.

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Apart from earning

money

Use synonyms

, companies

also

Linking Words

have social responsibilities. I completely agree with

latter

Add an article

the latter

show examples

point of view. On the one hand, setting up

business

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a business

show examples

has

the

Correct article usage

show examples

myriad of advantages. First and foremost, individuals can have a golden opportunity to make

profit

Add an article

a profit

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, nowadays most

people

Use synonyms

open their own restaurants or markets in order to make

money

Use synonyms

. But, sometimes

people

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may doom a failure.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it requires a lot of effort.

Also

Linking Words

, if somebody fails, it

shatter

Change the verb form

shatters

show examples

their confidence. Second

Change preposition

apply

show examples

all, by making

money

Use synonyms

citizens might have a chance to afford

Change preposition

apply

show examples

anything which will put them in

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

trouble,

such

Linking Words

as taxes

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

personal

expenditure

Fix the agreement mistake

expenditures

show examples

or the pricey things that

the

Correct your spelling

they

show examples

person want to have.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, establishing their own company will give them an opportunity to give a helping hand to other

people

Use synonyms

. There are a variety of ways to help others. First of all,

Correct article usage

the owner

show examples

owner

Fix the agreement mistake

owners

show examples

of the industrial companies or the various factories could improve

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

policies and

also

Linking Words

there have to

diversity

Add a missing verb

be diversity

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, if there is a lot of

people

Use synonyms

from different culture, it may

helps

Change the verb form

help

show examples

to create an enjoyable working atmosphere.

As a result

Linking Words

, it might increase their productivity.

Also

Linking Words

, they are able to take

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

delight in their working life. Second of all, when the bosses increase

wages

Correct article usage

the wages

show examples

of their employees, it might work for the worker's

advantages

Fix the agreement mistake

advantage

show examples

. Huge businesses are capable

to reduce

Change preposition

of reducing

show examples

taxes. It leads to

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

life for the population which is suffering from lack of

money

Use synonyms

To sum up

Linking Words

, by starting up their own business make

profit

Add an article

a profit

show examples

and do other individuals a good turn.

omondavlat91Tue Nov 07 2023

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task response

Task Response: The essay only partially addresses the prompt and lacks clear comprehensive ideas. Provide specific examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Coherence & Cohesion: The logical structure of the essay needs improvement. Additionally, the introduction and conclusion are present but lack development. Add more cohesive devices to improve the overall coherence.

lexical resource

Lexical Resource: Expand your range of vocabulary to convey ideas more effectively. Use a variety of words and phrases to express your points with more precision and clarity.

grammatical range

Grammatical Range: Work on using a wider range of grammatical structures and tenses. Pay attention to sentence structure and accurate word choice to enhance the overall grammatical range.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic: As well as, making money, business also have social responsibilities.

Your opinion

Many people believe that all zoos should be closed, while others claim that zoos have a positive impact. Discuss both sides and gove your opinion

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? Do you think this a positive or a negative situation?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays,many people choose to be self-employed,rather than to work for a company or organisation.why might this be the case?what could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

Some people think that government should decide which subject should students’ study at the University while others believe that students should be allowed to apply for subjects they prefer. Discuss both views.