IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad. Discuss both views and state your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Many hold a belief that organising an
event
Use synonyms
 about sport is an ideal chance for the honour of a
country
Use synonyms
while
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 some think of its bad side. From my perspective, it could be the biggest pride of the
country
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 if they are able to show its talents. On the one hand, many large businessmen usually criticise the investment in useless competition, which may not directly aim to improve the economy significantly than other fields.
Although
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sports
Use synonyms
in particular
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 or gaining health, in general, are necessary and familiar with real living, a
country
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 has to do a thousand research and experiments to host an enjoyable
event
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.
For example
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, the Summer Olympics is the world's largest and most prestigious conference held every four years. Ministers from various areas have to fight for the host position, where they have to show the investment, the ability to set up the venue, and time
as well as
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 management in the rules and number of candidates.
Therefore
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, it seems to be not a joke to build an international
sports
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event
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.
On the other hand
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, when there is a will in a group of passional athletes, there could be a chance for everyone who loves to be involved in
sports
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 activities.
Besides
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, it is a gold opportunity for international representatives to meet and support each other.
For example
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, there are ten countries in South East Asia
collaborate
Correct pronoun usage
that collaborate
show examples
 in
union
Add an article
the union
a union
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, named ASEAN. Every two years, they organise many
sports
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contest
Fix the agreement mistake
contests
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 where contestant try their best to get the gold medal.
In addition
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, it is
also
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 a place where people who share the same passion assist together to be cleverer and reach out internationally.
Thus
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, it helps to enhance the relationship among nations. In conclusion,
although
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 some still believe that it could be a challenge to organise a worldwide
event
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 about
sports
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, in my opinion, I still hope that a
country
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 that
dare
Change the verb form
dares
show examples
 to try their best not only for their honour but
also
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 for incorporating between national and international.

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task response
Provide a clear opinion and support it with specific reasons and examples
coherence and cohesion
Use a clearer structure to enhance the coherence of the essay
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and varied language
grammatical range
Work on sentence structure and use a wider variety of grammatical structures
Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic boost
  • infrastructure
  • national pride
  • cultural showcase
  • inspire a generation
  • temporary boost
  • environmental concerns
  • sustainable planning
  • public funds
  • divert resources
  • tourism influx
  • job opportunities
  • sports development
  • public health
  • construction
  • strategic investment
  • global audience
  • hospitality
  • public services
  • cost-benefit analysis
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