Some people say that the use of mobile phones should not be allowed in public places such as libraries, shops and on public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With the popularity of mobile phones, their usage has become an integral part of our daily lives.
While
some people maintain that handsets should be prohibited in public places
such
as libraries, shops and public transportation. In my view,
this
statement needs to be nuanced and may not always be the most appropriate solution.
Firstly
, smartphones play a critical role as a safety tool, enabling individuals to maintain communication with their loved ones and providing access to emergency services in times of crisis. Banning them could put people in harm’s way.
Secondly
, handsets provide a means of entertainment and distraction from the monotony of daily life. In shops, they can serve as a source of information, allowing customers to research products and compare prices.
Similarly
, on public transport, smartphones can help passengers kill time during long journeys,
as well as
provide directions or assistance when they get lost.
Instead
, we could promote responsible usage of cell phones through education and awareness-raising initiatives.
For example
, libraries could post signs asking customers to respect others and use their handsets in designated areas. The shop could have a quiet zone section away from the main shopping area for individuals to use their phones.
Likewise
, public transport operators could provide quiet zones or compartments where mobile device usage is discouraged. In
this
way, we can strike a balance between granting people autonomy to use their smartphones
while
also
respecting others in shared environments. In conclusion,
while
I understand the concerns about mobile devices causing disturbance in open areas, I believe that a ban on mobile devices is not always the most practical solution.
Submitted by xiaoruoling7 on

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task response
Ensure that the examples provided are directly related to the argument and emphasize the points more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
The overall logical structure is well-maintained. However, make sure that each paragraph flows seamlessly to enhance coherence.
lexical resource
Expand the range of vocabulary used to express ideas more clearly and precisely. Use a broader range of vocabulary to enrich the discussion.
grammatical range
Demonstrate a wider range of grammatical structures and more accurate use of complex structures for a higher score. Vary your sentence structures to showcase a broader grammatical range.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Distraction
  • Etiquette
  • Tranquility
  • Prohibit
  • Intrusive
  • Courtesy
  • Essential communication
  • Public decorum
  • Designated areas
  • Safety concerns
  • Noise pollution
  • Digital etiquette
  • Enforcement measures
  • Civic responsibility
  • Silent mode
  • Connectivity
  • Invasiveness
  • Social norms
  • Policy implementation
  • Moderation
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