Today, many people do not know their neighboars in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

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Nowadays, there are many
arguements
Correct your spelling
arguments
about the connection in
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
. Typically, many citizens do not have any information about their
neighboars
Correct your spelling
neighbours
in urban areas.
This
Linking Words
problem is attributable to the lack of leisure
time
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and the dependence
of
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on
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technology in
digital
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the digital
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era but can be addressed by encouraging
people
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attend to more public
activities
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. The underlying root of the problem is almost always human busy
life
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. Despite organising many outdoor
activities
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,
people
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is
Change the verb form
are
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always doing their work without
regarding
Replace the word
regard
show examples
to playing. All
works
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work
show examples
and no play can make
people
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become dull.
This
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situation stems from
people
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having too little
time
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for approaching
Change preposition
to approach
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society.
As a result
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,
this
Linking Words
can be an obstacle for
people
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to improve their ability
of communicating
Replace the preposition
to communicate
show examples
and make
people
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live a closed
life
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. Another factor may be the increasing of
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time use
Verb problem
the
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internet
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in
Change preposition
on
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thesedays
Correct your spelling
the days
.
In other words
Linking Words
, today
people
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tend to spend most
their
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of their
show examples
time
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for
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apply
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sulfing
Correct your spelling
surfing
sulking
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internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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or living in
virtual
Add an article
the virtual
a virtual
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world rather than
go
Wrong verb form
going
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out and
make
Wrong verb form
making
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friends in real
life
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.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
people
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lost
Wrong verb form
lose
show examples
many chances to learn about social knowledge. Take the Americans as an instance here, many
people
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do not know about their
neighboars
Correct your spelling
neighbours
due to
Linking Words
spending all
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time
Correct pronoun usage
their time
show examples
on using
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internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. Perhaps a solution to the problem of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
less knowledge about human
surrounding
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surroundings
show examples
is to be found in the form of encouraging
people
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take
Fix the infinitive
to take
show examples
part in outdoor
activities
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. The most effective approach is to organize a big meal which all
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people
Correct article usage
the people
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in
neighborhood
Add an article
the neighborhood
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can have together at the weekend and create conversations to let them close to each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
we can make
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
room for the utilisation of using phone during
this
Linking Words
whole
time
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as well to avoid the neglect.
This
Linking Words
situation can have a good influence on
friendship
Fix the agreement mistake
friendships
show examples
in
Add an article
the neighborhood
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neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
it can be seen that the distance between
people
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with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
is
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
human busy
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
and the
time
Use synonyms
they spend on
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it should have been demonstrated that urgent action needs to be taken in
a
Correct article usage
the
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form of making outdoor
activities
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more popular. It is a
goog
Correct your spelling
good
show examples
strategies
Change the noun form
strategy
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to help
people
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close
to
Correct pronoun usage
to it
show examples
.
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks coherence and cohesion. There is a lack of logical structure in the essay. There is no clear introduction and the conclusion is missing. The main points are not well supported and the supporting ideas are not well connected.
task achievement
The essay does not fully respond to the task. The ideas are not developed and the explanation is unclear. Examples are not relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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