IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The diagram below shows how rocks are created and destroyed in the rock cycle

The diagram below shows how rocks are created and destroyed in the rock cycle
The graph
illustrated
Wrong verb form
illustrates
show examples
 the life cycle of the
mosquito
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
mosquito
Use synonyms
 have an average lifespan and their lifespan consist
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 five main stages: started from eggs, larva, pupa,
adult
Use synonyms
 emerges, and
adult
Use synonyms
. Which is
two
Use synonyms
 of the stages occur in the water and the other
two
Use synonyms
 able to survive
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
two
Use synonyms
 habitats. The life cycle
begin
Change the verb form
begins
show examples
 when the mature
Mosquito
Use synonyms
 yields the egg and
laid
Replace the word
lies
show examples
 in
humid
Correct article usage
a humid
show examples
 place usually
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
suface
Correct your spelling
surface
 of water, after a that the mature egg
came
Verb problem
turns
show examples
 into a larva and
reside
Correct subject-verb agreement
resides
show examples
 in the water until
came to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the next stage which is pupa, after
reach
Correct subject-verb agreement
reaches
show examples
 the fourth
phase
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 known as
adult
Use synonyms
 emerges
phase
Use synonyms
, that
phase
Use synonyms
 was happened at
two
Use synonyms
 conditions but it should a humid site before it thrives to a
adult
Use synonyms
.
Then
Linking Words
, after
turn
Wrong verb form
turning
show examples
 into
Use synonyms
adult
Correct article usage
the adult
show examples
phase
Use synonyms
 the
mosquito
Use synonyms
able
Add a missing verb
is able
show examples
 to fly and migrate to the mainland, notably, the free air to seek and suck blood from
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 living things
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
 its survival.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words mosquito, adult, two, phase with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: