Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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It is true that nowadays
children
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use
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their mobile
phones
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more than usual for a variety of reasons.
Also
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, I believe that
this
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portable communication device is a positive kind of development. In the following paragraphs, both issues will be discussed.
Children
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spend time on their cell
phones
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for their several usages.
Firstly
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, mobile
phones
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become the most popular gadgets in today's world which revolutionized the ways of communication. So, teenagers
use
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their smartphones to stay in touch with their friends and
also
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be aware of their homework.
For instance
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, in the coronavirus epidemic, all school classes were held online and that was the only way teachers could be aware of their students and their educational situation.
Secondly
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,
children
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use
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these small gadgets to surf the internet and find answers to their problems and
also
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promote their educational status by watching useful videos and helping their creativity.
Finally
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, students
also
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use
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their smartphones to play games whenever there is no one to play with.
Nevertheless
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, mental games can challenge them and improve their problem-solving ability. In my view, mobile
phones
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and
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also
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apply
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advancements in technology have several benefits which outweigh their negative points. Actually, they are multi-functional devices which can decline our needs for other devices.
For example
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, having voice or video calls, sending messages or emails, and tracking exercise goals are some of the advantages.
In addition
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, people can have the fastest access to their documents, images, and their music.
Furthermore
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, by having a mobile phone, there is no need for paper maps or calendars. In summary, Mobile
phones
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can be a profitable device for
children
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and they can do most of their tasks related to their school.
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, it seems to me that smartphones can be the most convenient and useful gadgets for human life.

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task achievement
Make sure to directly address both parts of the task, providing clear opinions and thorough explanation for each.
coherence and cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to improve the essay structure and ensure ideas flow logically from one to the next.
lexical resource
There is room for improvement in the lexical resource by varying your word choices and avoiding repetition.
grammatical range
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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