In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, the
number
of elderly people is increasing in many nations. While
an ageing population doesn't have enough working employees
, I believe that there're
more advantages because the elderly have more expertise and can work effectively even after retirement.
The main drawback with a large Correct your spelling
there are
number
of citizens over 65 is the lack of employees
in a myriad of job fields. The reason is that the optimal working period for a human fall
between 18-Correct subject-verb agreement
falls
50
years old and most older people can't execute Correct word choice
and 50
in
jobs with high levels of Change preposition
apply
details
. Japan, Fix the agreement mistake
detail
for instance
, suffered for decades due to
the lack of available workers in their electronic factories and had to accepts
Change the verb
accept
employees
from other Asian countries such
as Vietnam.
On the other hand
, a large number
of elder people in society can provide a
profound knowledge, experience and Correct article usage
apply
the
long-term vision that most young workers can't have. Correct article usage
apply
Therefore
, they will be suitable to work as experts and consultants for companies, groups or even the government. For example
, most members of the Vietnamese consultation groups are experts in their fields with the
average age of over 60. Another advantage is that with easy access to the Internet, elderly Correct article usage
an
citizen
can now study new abilities and skills and continue their contributions in new positions Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
such
as content creators, models, coders or gamers. Hamako Mori, a 90-year old
Japanese citizen, is now world-famous for her excellent gaming skills Add a hyphen
90-year-old
who
can still play 7-8 hours a day and be able to compete in world championships.
In conclusion, an ageing population can restrict the Correct pronoun usage
she
number
of employees
in various job fields however
, the elderly can still work effectively with their expertise to provide consultations or contribute their talents in new position
.Fix the agreement mistake
positions
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task response
The essay adequately addresses the task, but the argumentation needs to be more balanced and consider counter-arguments.
coherence cohesion
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grammatical range
The essay generally maintains an appropriate level of grammatical accuracy. However, there are instances of inappropriate word choices and lack of sentence variety.
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- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
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