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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the amount spent on six consumer goods in four European countries. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. (Numbers mean “thousand”)

The chart below shows the amount spent on six consumer goods in four European countries. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. (Numbers mean “thousand”)
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The given data illustrates the expenses of six client products in Britain, France, Italy and Germany. The initial impression from the chart is the sales rate of all goods is the highest in Britain,
whereas
Linking Words
 the indicated in
chart
Correct article usage
the chart
show examples
 products’
buy-and -selling
Correct your spelling
buy-and-selling
show examples
 level in Germany is much lower and the other significant pattern
that
Add a missing verb
is that
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population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 of given four European countries spends much more money on photographic film than on personal stereos,
although
Linking Words
Germans
Use synonyms
 buy toys and CDs even less. The French and the Italians spend slightly over 150 000 on toys
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
when
Correct word choice
while
show examples
 the
Germans
Use synonyms
 spend around 145 000 which is the same amount they spend on CDs,
however
Linking Words
, the
Germans
Use synonyms
 spend just over 145 000 on personal stereos like
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people in France. The biggest amount of expenses can be indicated in Britain on photographic film, where British people spend
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
nearly 170 thousand,
while
Linking Words
Germans
Use synonyms
 buy the same
good
Fix the agreement mistake
goods
show examples
fewer
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
less and spend around 150 thousand.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words germans with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "indicated" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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