People aim to achieve balance between work and other activities of their lives, but few are able to do this. Suggest problems in balancing and some solution for over-coming such problems

Over the
last
two or three decades, lifestyle and how people
work
have changed dramatically. People try to balance their
work
life
and personal
life
but are unable to do so.
This
essay will discuss why
this
might be the case and how
this
problem can be alleviated. The reasons for the variation among different activities of
life
are quite simple.
Firstly
, in some countries, individuals have to follow a hectic
life
schedule where they do not get enough time to plan things. What I mean by
this
is that many jobs require a lot of physical or mental strength which makes them feel exhausted and frustrated when they come back
home
from
work
. Another major contributing factor can be a lack of cooperation and unity among family
members
.
For instance
, if all the family
members
don't support and help each other to complete household duties
then
arguments can lead to big fights and negativity at
home
.
As a result
, one can find it challenging to manage things at
work
and
home
. Several viable solutions can be helpful to overcome disparity in
life
. First of all, the workload on the shoulders of employees must be bearable, so that it doesn't affect their psychological health and they can get adequate peace of mind and rest not only at
work
but at
home
as well.
Furthermore
, all the family
members
must have an understanding of each other and should
work
cooperatively to minimise the burden of just one person.
Work
must be divided among all without considering gender preferences which will help strengthen the bond of the family and they will find it easy to balance different activities of day-to-day
life
.
To conclude
, It is a hectic
work
and
life
schedule and a lack of understanding among family
members
, that prevent them from balancing
life
well which can be resolved by the efforts of the employer and employee at
work
and family member's connections at
home
.
Submitted by sainisonia422 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Address the prompt in a more direct and focused manner. Provide more specific examples and details to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a clear logical structure with a well-organized introduction and conclusion. However, the connection between ideas could be improved through the use of transition words and cohesive devices.
lexical resource
Vary your vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and maintain a formal tone throughout the essay. There are some instances of repetitive language and informal expressions that can be replaced with more diverse and sophisticated vocabulary.
grammatical range
Diversify sentence structures and use a wider range of grammatical constructions to enhance clarity and fluency. Additionally, pay attention to subject-verb agreement and use of prepositions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: