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Band 4

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this messege?

#cultures #children #messege
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In some nations,
children
Use synonyms
 usually believe that they are able to get everything if they
effort
Verb problem
exert
show examples
 a lot.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will check
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 and disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
 issue.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
Work
Use synonyms
 for
children
Use synonyms
 is an opposite point.Because they can achieve anything they want in future.
For example
Linking Words
,if a child does not
work
Use synonyms
,he should ask his parents for help to get something.
While
Linking Words
 a kid who can earn money will be more
success
Replace the word
successful
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
 will
accustom
Wrong verb form
accustomed
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 some problems at
work
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
,he will know
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
how people behave and what will be their action.
Thirdly
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
 money
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
children
Use synonyms
 more happy.Namely, when a child
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
 cash himself, it will be pleasant for him.
Also
Linking Words
,it is a good way to have a great future.As an example,if they save money from age eight to ten, are able to purchase an expensive thing like
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
 or mobile for themselves.
In addition
Linking Words
,by working they are one step ahead of their peers.Both materially and spiritually.
As
Change preposition
For
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
instance,
thay
Correct your spelling
they
 are able to
proud
Add a missing verb
be proud
show examples
 of themselves or save currency for their life.Plus, they learn new things.Proverbially,
kids
Use synonyms
 will learn how to
work
Use synonyms
 better when they get a real job.
finally
Linking Words
,we can say that
Use synonyms
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
 for
children
Use synonyms
,
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
show examples
 their proficiency. For
disadvantages
Add a comma
disadvantages,
show examples
 we can refer to
this
Linking Words
 that
work
Use synonyms
 can be dangerous for some
kids
Use synonyms
.As an example, they may get lost or get injured
while
Linking Words
 working.The next tip is that most of the
children
Use synonyms
 cannot live without their parents in the strange world.Allegorically,they might
strave
Correct your spelling
strive
starve
 or burst into tears.We can add
Linking Words
this
Change preposition
to this
show examples
 subject that lots of people are butterfingered and cannot do something well.For a sample,they break or burn the utensil.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,if the
kids
Use synonyms
 do not succeed, some of them will be completely disappointed.
Means
Correct pronoun usage
This means
show examples
,
perhaps
Correct word choice
that perhaps
show examples
 they do not
work
Use synonyms
 anymore in their childhood.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
,most of the
children
Use synonyms
 really and deeply do not like to
work
Use synonyms
.So,if their parents force them to do that,
kids
Use synonyms
 hate
more
Correct pronoun usage
them more
show examples
.Eventually,doing
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 by
children
Use synonyms
 can
hurts
Wrong verb form
hurt
show examples
 them more,rather than
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
 them.
To sum up
Linking Words
,in some cultures
children
Use synonyms
 think that if they
work
Use synonyms
hardly
Change the word
hard
show examples
 and
sufficient
Add a missing verb
are sufficient
show examples
,they will be prosperous to attain anything which
thay
Correct your spelling
they
 desire and
this
Linking Words
 has some benefits and defects.I believe,
having
Correct word choice
that having
show examples
 a job
however
Linking Words
 small will be helpful for them and
assists
Correct subject-verb agreement
assist
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their fate.
Submitted by farhadmahmoodi227 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

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A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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