IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#governments #money #railways #roads
Infrastructure development plays a crucial role in a nation's progress and economic growth. I strongly agree with
this
 point of view which government should prioritize
invest
Wrong verb form
investing
show examples
 more budget
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
railways
 because
they
Add a verb
they are
they were
show examples
 environmentally friendly. To embark on, funding
railways
 encourage green travel.
one
Capitalize word
One
show examples
 of the major reason
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
construction
Add an article
the construction
show examples
 of
railways
 is their efficiency and sustainability.
Railways
 have
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 capacity to fit
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 considerable amount of
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
passengers
show examples
,
therefore
 it could be
consequence
Add an article
a consequence
the consequence
show examples
 of reducing traffic congestion and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wasting time
for accomplished
Change preposition
to accomplish
show examples
 all the work.
Moreover
, focus on
enhancement
Correct article usage
the enhancement
show examples
 of roads
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 of
increasing
Replace the word
increase
show examples
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 emission of toxic gases and
effect
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
public health and
atmosphere
Correct article usage
the atmosphere
show examples
.
For instance
,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 country like India
transfer
Change the verb form
transfers
show examples
multitudinous
Correct article usage
a multitudinous
show examples
 population all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
day with
railways
.
In addition
, investing in
train
Correct article usage
the train
show examples
 system
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 vast benefits
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
economic and social. Trains can export and
imports
Correct subject-verb agreement
import
show examples
 freight and cargo in widely used between countries.
it
Capitalize word
It
show examples
 can
be expand
Change the verb form
expand
show examples
 international trade and bring many
appanages
Correct your spelling
advantages
show examples
 to
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
.
Moreover
,
this
 kind of investment would allow to establish tourism and attract more visitors,
as well as
 foreign investors.
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
hence
, promoting connecting between cities by modern trains, can improve and escalate the local industry
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 absorbing tourism.
To conclude
,
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
compare
Replace the word
comparison
show examples
 with roads, the statistic
accident
Fix the agreement mistake
accidents
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
going on the roads is much more than the
railways
.
Thus
, in my
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
thinking, allocating a great budget
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
railway
Correct article usage
the railway
show examples
 cause of
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 social, economic and
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 would be a wise decision.
Submitted by n97.mortazian on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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