IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country.

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country.
#line #results #survey #people #city #country
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The graph illustrates the data collected from a
survey
Use synonyms
 about the
reason
Use synonyms
 for moving to the capital city of a particular nation from
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2000 to 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
, moving for employment
Use synonyms
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 dominated the
relocate
Replace the word
relocation
show examples
 population,
while
Linking Words
 only
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
 amount of people went to
capital
Add an article
the capital
show examples
 city for family / friends or adventure.
Study
Add an article
The study
show examples
 was the second hot cause for driving the relocation. Employment was the majority driver for men and women
Correct pronoun usage
who migrate
show examples
migrate
Wrong verb form
migrated
show examples
 to
capital
Add an article
the capital
a capital
show examples
 city and it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
gradually increased from the beginning of 60000 to the peak of 90000 in 2010.
Afterward
Change the spelling
Afterwards
show examples
,
although
Linking Words
 employment as the moving population went slightly down to below 90000 in 2015, it was the top
reason
Use synonyms
amoung
Correct your spelling
among
four
Correct article usage
the four
show examples
categorys
Correct your spelling
categories
category
. Visiting family / friends and having
adventure
Fix the agreement mistake
adventures
show examples
 were the least selection in the
survey
Use synonyms
.
Althought
Correct your spelling
Although
 they were both started at 1000 in 2000 and
graudally
Correct your spelling
gradually
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 across the
survey
Use synonyms
 reporting period,
these two
Change the determiner
this two reason
these two reasons
show examples
reason
Use synonyms
 never above 20000 selection.
Study
Add an article
The study
A study
show examples
 being the second most selected option in the
survey
Use synonyms
, it had a rapid growth In 2010, the study
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 a
pleature
Correct your spelling
pleasure
 and growth rate lower. For the latest reporting year, the
reason
Use synonyms
 with
studening
Correct your spelling
student
Submitted by sangelamami on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words survey, reason with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • relocation
  • migration
  • employment opportunities
  • educational facilities
  • vibrant lifestyle
  • healthcare access
  • medical services
  • social connections
  • infrastructure
  • transport facilities
  • data trends
  • survey results
  • capital city
  • allure
  • motivating factor
  • influencing
  • attracting
  • analysis
  • evaluation
  • assessment
  • consideration
  • exploration
  • introduction
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