In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think that is a positive or a negative development?

Residents of the countryside would rather live in
cities
than in rural areas nowadays,
thus
the number of inhabitants is declining. Moving to
cities
is a negative development that may lead to overpopulation which can cause
traffic
issues, residence problems, and employment
shortage
Fix the agreement mistake
shortages
show examples
. The first and main, overcrowding in
cities
can lead to several drawbacks
such
as
traffic
jams and high prices in real estate value. The
people
, who move to big
cities
, require a place to live, so there is a supply-demand issue that increases the costs of an apartment, so they become not affordable.
Therefore
, in the end,
people
might be homeless or be trapped in poverty for the long term.
Additionally
, the growing population can cause
traffic
congestion, specifically
traffic
jams.
Hence
, it can be stressful and exhausting for
people
to use public transport or vehicles on a daily basis.
Secondly
, another thing to worry about is the shortage of jobs in
cities
.
Due to
immigration to urban areas, there is competition in the labour market. In
this
regard, the employers might behave themselves inappropriately,
as well as
decrease the salary or demand something
that is
not their job description, because they can replace them with a new employee easily.
This
can result in unemployment and low wages. In conclusion, the given examples show the negative effects of urban relocations, it can harm every citizen
as well as
the
people
who move out. In order to avoid these problems, the government should improve the conditions of rural zones to make life in the countryside more attractive.
Otherwise
, urban resettlements will not stop.
Submitted by kama.star.00 on

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task response
The response provides a clear position on the issue but lacks in-depth development and analysis. It does not fully address all aspects of the task and would benefit from exploring both positive and negative aspects of the rural to urban migration.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a basic organizational structure, but there are issues with coherence and logical progression of ideas. The introduction and conclusion are present, but the body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and transitions between ideas.
lexical resource
The essay shows a limited range in vocabulary and lacks sophistication in lexical choices. It also contains some inaccuracies and awkward phrasings, affecting the overall lexical resource score.
grammatical range
The essay displays a variety of sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors and inaccuracies. The use of punctuation and sentence structure can be confusing, leading to a lack of clarity and coherence in the essay.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
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