In many countries, city planners locate offices, schools, homes and shops in certain areas so that they are seperated by distance. Do you think the advantages of this practice outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #city #planners #offices #schools #homes #shops #areas #distance #practice

Recently in various nations, urban planners have located offices, educational institutes, houses and shopping spots separate from each other.

This

due to

its several benefits.

However

, there are some drawbacks to

this

. In

this

essay, I am going to discuss both pros and cons of the statement. Looking at the advantage of separating these spots is

traffic

flow. By

this

, I mean that, if these points are far away from each other,

then

the only

traffic

in one spot is the

traffic

related to the specific organization which can

also

reduce road accidents.

For example

, if there is a

school

in a particular area of a city

then

in that area the

traffic

would be only related to that

school

Moreover

this

type of planning is

also

time and money-saving.

For instance

, a man drops his children at

school

and if he finds a shopping centre near the

school

then

he must make a visit there which can waste his time and

also

consume a lot of money.

On the other hand

, difficult access to these points is the main disadvantage. To elaborate on

this

, separating these from each other can make it difficult to go to one place and come back

while

in an emergency.

For example

, if an accidental emergency comes into the home and a medical shop is far away from

house

Add an article

the house

show examples

this

can lead to a big disturbance in the house. Keeping the above argument in mind it is concluded that, there are disadvantages of keeping everything separated by distance in case of an emergency where

Remove the article

apply

show examples

easy and quick access can be found difficult.

However

, there are a bunch of advantages in terms of

traffic

flow which can reduce accidents. I think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages here.

Submitted by umark5353 on Sat Nov 11 2023

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Task Response

Ensure a clear introductory statement that addresses the prompt directly. Consider rephrasing the introduction to explicitly state your opinion and outline the main points to be discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay exhibits a generally logical structure, however, the conclusion could be more conclusive by summarizing the main points discussed. Additionally, the use of cohesive devices such as transition words and linking phrases can enhance overall coherence.

Lexical Resource

The essay includes a range of vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and overgeneralizations. Work on using more precise and varied vocabulary to express ideas effectively.

Grammatical Range

While the essay demonstrates a good command of grammar, there are instances of inaccurate word choice and awkward sentence structures. Review and revise sentence structures and vocabulary usage for clarity and precision.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countries, city planners locate offices, schools, homes and shops in certain areas so that they are seperated by distance. Do you think the advantages of this practice outweigh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owing a smartphone the disadvantages?

In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Dicuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people believe that children that commit crimes should be punished. Others think the parents should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that childhood is the best stage of happiness. while others believe that a person can enjoy more happiness in other stages of life. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Students are becoming more and more reliant on technology. What are some of the problems associated with reliance on computers, and what are some of the possible solutions?