It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Considering a lot of factors before making a decision for something can help
people
to be careful with their choices and ensure their future outcomes resulting from their decisions. However
, the drawbacks it can yield far outweigh these benefits, the most noteworthy of these cons being that individuals
might lose a chance to experience new challenges in their lives, and they can lose opportunities to get promotion
in Fix the agreement mistake
promotions
working
.
Replace the word
work
Firstly
, people
can learn some new things from taking risks
so that they can get out of their comfort zone. With regards to everybody’s personal lives, as the majority of people
try to find some new activities in order to get some benefits from them, they might need to admit the risks
that can come. For example
, one
year ago, my friend, Mickey, had a dream about studying abroad, but he concerned
that he might not have Add a missing verb
was concerned
an
ability to handle his life in the US; Change the article
the
nevertheless
, his mother encouraged him to be brave, so he decided to go study oversea by himself, resulting in he can managing his life really well. This
shows that if individuals
do not try to take the
Correct article usage
apply
risks
in
some time, they Change preposition
for
would
end up regretting their previous decisions.
Wrong verb form
will
Secondly
, many individuals
fear doing something that is
not safe because they do not want to risk their professional lives. In the workplaces
, some Fix the agreement mistake
workplace
of
employees do not have enough encouragement to express their opinions in the work projects, Change preposition
apply
whereas
they have a really high potential in work. One
of my dad’s friends, for instance
, told me that when he was still in
work, he was just an employee, but Change preposition
at
one
day his boss asked for everyone’s opinions whether
their company should change the packaging of products. All of those employees stayed silent, and suddenly my dad’s friend was the only Change preposition
on whether
one
who commented on that topic, saying that he did not agree with that project. Consequently
, his employer saw that he was the only one
who braved enough to express his thoughts and evaluated him to be in a higher position. According to
this
, it is evident that taking risks
may provide some opportunities and better their working life.
In conclusion, people
may need to take the
Correct article usage
apply
risks
on some occasions because it might bring a lot of benefits to them, as it helps to evaluate their position in the workplaces
and givesFix the agreement mistake
workplace
a
chance for Correct pronoun usage
them a
individuals
to learn something new. If people
do not start to do something just because it seems unsafe, they might not get out of their comfort zone.Submitted by mena201205 on
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task response
The essay addresses the topic by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks. However, there is a lack of clarity and depth in the response, and the examples provided are not fully relevant to the discussion.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is somewhat clear, but there is room for improvement in the organization of ideas. The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, and the progression of ideas is not always smooth.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary, but there are instances of wordy or awkward expressions. Some phrases are unclear or imprecise, affecting the overall lexical resource.
grammatical range
The essay shows an attempt to use a variety of complex structures, but there are errors in sentence structure, punctuation, and word choice. It would benefit from more accurate and precise language use.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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