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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows the number of medals won by the top ten countries in the 2018 Winter Olympic Games.

The table shows the number of medals won by the top ten countries in the 2018 Winter Olympic Games.
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The table provides information on how many
medals
Use synonyms
 from three categories
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 achieved by
10
Correct article usage
the 10
show examples
 best countries during
Winter
Correct article usage
the Winter
show examples
 Olympic Games in 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
medals
Use synonyms
 won in each category is different in each country. Norway and Germany as the leading country in the games achieved the same
number
Use synonyms
 of
gold
Use synonyms
medal
Fix the agreement mistake
medals
show examples
 (14),
while
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
silver
Use synonyms
 and
bronze
Use synonyms
 achieved by Germany was 4
medals
Use synonyms
 lower than Norway.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, Canada,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States, and
Netherlands
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 got 9, 8, and 7
gold
Use synonyms
medals
Use synonyms
 respectively. Meanwhile,
silver
Use synonyms
medals
Use synonyms
 won by Canada and
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 two numbers ahead of
Correct article usage
the Netherland
show examples
Netherland
Fix the agreement mistake
Netherlands
show examples
, and
Use synonyms
bronze
Correct article usage
the bronze
show examples
 won by the United States and
Netherlands
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
show examples
 was around
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of that of Canada. For the
last
Linking Words
 5 countries, Sweden won the most
gold
Use synonyms
 and
silver
Use synonyms
 (7 and 6 respectively), but the least in
bronze
Use synonyms
 (1).
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, South Korea, Switzerland, France, and Austria received the same
number
Use synonyms
 of
gold
Use synonyms
 (5), but the
number
Use synonyms
 of
silver
Use synonyms
medal
Fix the agreement mistake
medals
show examples
was ranging
Wrong verb form
ranged
show examples
 from 3-8.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, South Korea and Switzerland achieved 4
bronze
Use synonyms
medals
Use synonyms
, which was two
Use synonyms
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
 lower than what France and Austria got.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "following this".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words medals, number, gold, silver, bronze with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Winter Olympic Games
  • medal count
  • medal tally
  • gold, silver, bronze medals
  • ranking
  • dominant countries
  • athletic performance
  • medal standings
  • podium finishes
  • olympic achievements
  • top contenders
  • competitive edge
  • historical record
  • national pride
  • sportsmanship
  • medal distribution
  • overall trend
  • athletic prowess
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