IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and year after it was refurbished. The charts shows the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same period.

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and year after it was refurbished. The charts shows the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same period.
#numbers #visitors #ashdown #museum #year #surveys #visit #period
The lower table depicts the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
visitors
 to Ashdown Museum during the period before and after it was
refubrished
Correct your spelling
refurbished
, with the pie charts indicating whether they enjoyed their visit during the same period. In general, we can see from the data that after
refubrishment
Correct your spelling
refurbishment
 the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of tourists rose significantly,
furthermore
 the proportion of tourists that were 'satisfied' and 'very satisfied'
inreased
Correct your spelling
increased
 dramatically. It can be clearly seen that after
year
Correct article usage
the year
show examples
 when
Museum
Correct article usage
the Museum
show examples
 was
refubrished
Correct your spelling
refurbished
 the percentage of dissatisfied
visitors
derceased
Correct your spelling
decreased
deceased
 more than two times,
whereas
 the percentage of 'satisfied' tourists rose slightly
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 ten per
cent
. The figures were fifteen per
cent
 and
fourty
Correct your spelling
forty
four
 per
cent
 respectively. Meanwhile, for 'very satisfied' guests the pattern appears slightly different. In
year
Add an article
the year
show examples
 before
refubrishment
Correct your spelling
refurbishment
 the rate accounts for
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
 15 per
cent
, but after
refrefubrishment
Correct your spelling
re refurbishment
 the figure increased to 35 per
cent
.
Additionally
, after
reconstruction
Add a comma
reconstruction,
show examples
 the proportion of 'very dissatisfied'
visitors
 declined two times from 10 per
cent
 to five per
cent
.
According to
 the table, during the year after
Correct your spelling
re refurbishment
refrefubrishment
Add a comma
refrefubrishment,
show examples
 the total number of
visitors
 moved upward significantly from 74 000 to 92 000.
Submitted by dnm.best on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • refurbishment
  • visitor satisfaction
  • facilities
  • accessibility
  • interactive elements
  • visitor feedback
  • aesthetic improvements
  • functionality improvements
  • marketing and advertising
  • special events
  • educational programs
  • engaging environment
  • comfortable environment
  • diverse experiences
What to do next:
Look at other essays: