Everyone should be encouraged to use fewer resources rather than recycle more. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#resources

Resources are consumed at an accelerated speed in modern society as with the rapid rise of the global population and industries. Some people believe that it is more significant to spend less on

materials

than recycle them. I generally agree with

this

for the following reasons.

To begin

with, there is enough evidence to support the idea that it is a must for everyone to consume less raw

materials

this

will maintain biodiversity and increase the chances of our future

generation

Change noun form

generation's

show examples

survival. Saving energy, especially electricity, could help us to utilise

Correct pronoun usage

it more

show examples

appropriately for other areas where it should be used wisely.

For instance

, in developing countries,

such

as Pakistan, many villages are living in darkness because of the lack of electricity. Even though they are willing to pay for service, unfortunately, the demand cannot be fulfilled because of the overconsumption of lights in urban areas.

Consequently

, people have to live without heat and light

due to

the improper management of energy resources.

On the other hand

postive

Correct your spelling

positive

consequences will be expected through recycling as it produces less

wastes

Fix the agreement mistake

waste

show examples

as more citizens buy second-hand items.

For instance

, Finland is popular for its vehement commitment to protecting the environment. In fact, 60% of the products sold in the country use recycled

materials

Furthermore

, there are trash boxes designed to collect garbage in different categories

such

as cans, bottles and plastics in unanimous spots. It has made spectacular outcomes in saving natural

materials

However

, many nations still underestimate the significance of recycling as they distribute free plastic bags and paper in stores, prioritizing their convenience and economic activities. In conclusion,

while

recycling is one of the common ways to limit natural destruction, its impact is still minimal because of the unwillingness of many countries. It would be more realistic and effective for countries to encourage consumers to use fewer resources.

Submitted by mizuho on Mon Nov 13 2023

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task achievement

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coherence and cohesion

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lexical resource

Expand the range of vocabulary used, considering synonyms and more precise word choices for a higher level of lexical resource.

grammatical range

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

309 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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