Many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of lives, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem? How to overcome it?

#people #aim #balance #work #parts #lives

In the pursuit of cultivating a harmonious equilibrium between professional and personal life, many aspire to

this

, yet only a fraction successfully attain it.

This

essay will discuss the intricacies of

this

challenge are rooted in various factors and the necessitating targeted interventions. A primary obstacle to achieving

this

harmony is the relentless escalation of occupational stress. The heightened expectations of contemporary society ensnare individuals in their careers, leaving insufficient time for other life dimensions.

Moreover

, technological advancements contribute to a continuous influx of job-related information during non-working periods,

further

blurring the lines between professional responsibilities and personal time.

In addition

, societal expectations and prevailing workplace cultures exacerbate

this

challenge. Some succumb to societal pressures, convinced that significant professional accomplishments require unwavering dedication. Workplace cultures that emphasize prolonged working hours perpetuate the notion that recognition can only be earned through intense commitment, trapping individuals in an inescapable cycle of overwork and hindering equilibrium. To surmount

this

, businesses must champion more flexible arrangements. By offering options

such

as adjustable schedules and remote work, employers enable employees to reconcile their professional and personal lives. Establishing a culture that values efficiency over extended periods helps shift the mindset away from overworking.

Moreover

, individuals need to enhance self-management by setting clear goals and prioritizing personal aspects. Developing realistic schedules ensures sufficient time for personal interests and familial activities outside of their careers. In conclusion, attaining a harmonious equilibrium between professional and personal life remains a pervasive challenge. By refining structures, adjusting societal expectations, and reinforcing individual self-management, society can progress towards a more balanced and fulfilling existence.

Submitted by xiaoruoling7 on Mon Nov 13 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Ensure to address all aspects of the prompt in equal measure to ensure a complete response.

coherence and cohesion

Maintain a logical and organized structure throughout the essay, particularly in connecting ideas within and between paragraphs.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary while maintaining precision and appropriateness in word choice.

grammatical range

Continue to demonstrate control and precision in grammatical structures, including complex and compound sentences.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own countries. Nowadays, they have more opportunities to study abroad. What are the advantages and the disadvantages of this development?
It is often thought that in the past time pupils were providing a university course in their home town. However, these days there are more chances to make your education in another state. In the next paragraphs, I will discuss the positive and negative effect of this impact.
<4
band
An incraesing number of people want to buy clothes, shoes and other items produced by famous international brands. Why is this? do you think it is a posituve or a negative development?
Nowadays, more and more people can afford fashion items produced by famous international brands. In this essay, I will argue that it is a positive development to buy designers' products.
4
band
In some parts of the world it is becoming popular to research the history of one’s own family. Why might people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development?
In certain areas of the world, it becomes a trend to have a pedigree analysis of one’s own family because people want to be aware of their medical history due to growing disease rate nowadays. In my opinion, it is a positive approach as it would help them to identify suspected inherited syndromes.
7.5
band
Some people think that the government is responsible for looking after the elderly. Others believe that it should be family members. What do you think should take responsibilities?
Nowadays, many people believe that elders should be taken care of by the government. Others also claim that these elders are responsible for their families. This essay displays a personal view of which side is responsible for this motion.
8
band
Today, many mothers take care of the family and do not go to work. Some people believe that the government should pay them their salaries. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
A mother’s role in the family is considered an asset for many years for great bonding. Nowadays, many mothers do not work and concentrate on family members and their wellness. Some people argue that they should be paid salaries by the government. I disagree with this statement for two reasons and this essay will explain those in detail.

Many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of lives, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem? How to overcome it?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own countries. Nowadays, they have more opportunities to study abroad. What are the advantages and the disadvantages of this development?

An incraesing number of people want to buy clothes, shoes and other items produced by famous international brands. Why is this? do you think it is a posituve or a negative development?

In some parts of the world it is becoming popular to research the history of one’s own family. Why might people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Some people think that the government is responsible for looking after the elderly. Others believe that it should be family members. What do you think should take responsibilities?

Today, many mothers take care of the family and do not go to work. Some people believe that the government should pay them their salaries. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?