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Band 6.5

The graph below shows the average monthly use of health club in Miami and Florida by all full-time members in 2017. The pie charts show the age profile of male and female members of this health club.

The graph below shows the average monthly use of health club in Miami and Florida by all full-time members in 2017. The pie charts show the age profile of male and female members of this health club.
#health #club #miami #florida #members #show #age #profile
The graph provides information about the wield of fitness
centre
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centres
show examples
 in Miami and Florida in the year 2017, the data shown
in
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is
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 average, and the pie charts illustrate
Add an article
the profile
show examples
profile
Fix the agreement mistake
profiles
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 of male and
female'
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female
show examples
members
Change to a genitive case
member's
members'
show examples
age
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ages
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.
Overall
, the graph experienced a
fluctuate
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fluctuating
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 ward during
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 year, and the
member
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members
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 of
club
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the club
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 were dominated by
adult
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adults
show examples
. Looking at the bar chart, in general view the male
users
 of fitness centres were always higher than female
users
,
although
 the ward seems
sporradic
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sporadic
. The male
users
 hit a high of approximately 850 people in
Juny
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June
,
meanwhile
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meanwhile,
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 the female
users
 only reach 700
at
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in
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 that month.
In addition
, the male
users
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
a
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the
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 lowest point at 550 in February, before experiencing a growth until
Juny
Correct your spelling
June
. In terms of the aged category, male and female
users
 dominated with adult group,
however
, males
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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made up the largest part of the chart than
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
.
Moreover
, female
users
 in older age contributed the most to the chart.
Submitted by fatimanastitiniskala on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words users with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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