Every year several language die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer language in the world. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Some people believe that the downward trend in the number of existing
languages
Use synonyms
may make life easier. I concur with
this
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perspective because the
diversity
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of
languages
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is responsible for the
globalization
Use synonyms
deceleration and divisions between communities.
To begin
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with,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
languages
Change the noun form
language
show examples
diversity
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is empowering the notion
to neglect
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of neglecting
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the
globalization
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trend
..
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
This
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is because some ethnic people
pront
Correct your spelling
want
to stop the spread
foreign
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of foreign
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
in their local area, as an action to ensure the original culture does not fade. Since the number of
Use synonyms
language
Change to a plural noun
languages
show examples
continously
Correct your spelling
continuously
drop, it leads to the progression of
globalization
Use synonyms
because some countries or
locally
Change the word
local
show examples
groups may
failed
Change the verb form
fail
show examples
with the global trends
due to
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the
language
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barier
Correct your spelling
barrier
.
Therefore
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, the fewer
Use synonyms
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
in the world, the greater the impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the nation and its
society
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. One of the primary reasons supporting
this
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stance is
language
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diversity
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promotes difficulty
to unite
Change preposition
in uniting
show examples
society
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.
This
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is
because
Add the preposition
because of
show examples
the hardship
to
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of
show examples
having a conversation between one specific local inhabitant to others.
For instance
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, Indonesia is a country with more than
hundered
Correct your spelling
hundred
local
languages
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, which
language
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gap easily found.
Furthermore
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, the
diversity
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of local
languages
Use synonyms
leads to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of unity
between
Change preposition
in
show examples
society
Use synonyms
because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
absense
Correct your spelling
absence
of clear communication.
Therefore
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, the tragedy which
resulted
Add the preposition
resulted in
resulted from
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a
shrink
Change the verb form
shrinking
show examples
number of
languages
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may potentially break the wall of
language
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barrier.
As a result
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, it could unite people between tribes or even countries. In conclusion, I strongly support the idea
regarding
Change preposition
that
show examples
life will be easier since
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fewer
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language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
used.
This
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is because the more uniform the
language
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, resulting in progressions in
globalization
Use synonyms
and united
society
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.
Submitted by elroivan on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a central idea and supports it coherently. Your essay lacks consistency in maintaining the logical flow of ideas and examples.
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt, but there is a lack of depth and clarity in your explanation. Your response is somewhat incomplete as it does not fully address the points raised in the prompt, requiring a more thorough consideration of the issues.
lexical resource
There is a fair range of vocabulary used, but some words and phrases are not used accurately or effectively. It is important to use precise and appropriate vocabulary to express your ideas clearly.
grammatical range
Your essay demonstrates a reasonable control of a range of complex structures, but there are recurring grammatical errors and inaccuracies. Pay attention to sentence structure and verb tenses to improve grammatical accuracy.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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