In some countries, ordinary citizens are allowed to keep a gun in their homes. Some people think this is a good idea, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #citizens #gun #homes #people #idea

There is a debate over whether the personal possession of a

gun

should be justifiable or not. Both views will be discussed in

this

essay and I believe that the latter view is more persuasive.

To begin

with, there are some reasons why people can legitimately possess a

gun

. For one thing, people can protect themselves with a

gun

, especially when they are in a hazardous situation. There might be a moment where public power,

such

as police, is vacant.

For example

, if they are threatened by robberies, they can use their

gun

so as to immediately escape the danger. In spite of the reasons mentioned above, I reckon that private

guns

should be illegal.

This

is because,

firstly

, it leads to unsafe surroundings, causing abuse of the

gun

. To be specific, it would give rise to not only serious injuries but

also

jeopardy of life provided that someone accidentally shoots others. In fact, there are a lot of random shooting accidents in countries where the government grants to carry a

gun

case

Correct article usage

A case

show examples

in point

Add a missing verb

is, USA

show examples

USA

Correct article usage

the USA

show examples

Furthermore

, the probability of a shooting accident is much greater than encountering burglars.

Secondly

, the legitimation of

guns

is deleterious to educational aspects, making children exposed to gratuitous violence. Children who grow near arms are more likely to be tamed by drastic ways to resolve the problem compared to the other kids who live without

guns

. In a nutshell,

although

some people contend that a

gun

is needed for self-protection, allowing to keep

guns

has more demerits of safety and education.

Submitted by moonmond15 on Tue Nov 14 2023

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some countries, ordinary citizens are allowed to keep a gun in their homes. Some people think this is a good idea, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Directors and managers of organization are often older people. Some people say that it is better for younger people to be leaders. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some say that it would be better if the majority of employees worked from home instead of travelling to a workplace every day. Do you think the advantages of working from home outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people are very strict about their school uniforms and the apprearance of their pupils, while other schools have a relaxed dress cod

3)Although countries with long average working hours are economically successful, this often has some negative social consequences. To what extent do you agree or disagree?