IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

some people say that international problems should be tackled at a national level. However, others argue that these should be managed globally. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

#people #level
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There are differing opinions regarding whether international
issues
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 should be solved nationally or internationally.
While
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countries
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' collaboration allows resource sharing, which lead to a practical
solution
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, I believe that some problem could be straightforwardly solved at the national
level
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 because of the one-direction policy. On the one hand, the experiment process to find the most effective
solution
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 may efficiently
work
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 in a country's landscape.
This
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 is because of the absence of multi-policy makers if it is conducted at a national
level
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.
Consequently
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, the finding
solution
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 process could be more straightforward.
For example
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, when a country expects to solve global warming
issues
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 like deforestation. There is no necessity to align the government if the experiment is in a local area.
Thus
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, the more practical the problem-solving process, the faster the
solution
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 is acquired.
Therefore
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, the
solution
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 found at a national
level
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 ought to scale up at the international
level
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.
On the other hand
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, the international problem requires excellent resources to solve it,
such
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 as money, human resources, and policy joint.
Furthermore
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, multiple
countries
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 need to
work
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 together and share their national power.
For example
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, the global trend to achieve zero net emissions in 2040 requires all
countries
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 to collaborate and
work
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 closely. Reducing the carbon impact needs many research and development processes, which may burn a considerable amount of money and, more importantly, agreement among the policymakers.
Thus
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, some international
issues
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 may be effectively solved if they are collaboratively between
countries
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. In conclusion, I am considering the scope of the
issues
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. In my opinion, some problems may
work
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 more straightforwardly at the national
level
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, allowing one directional policy.
However
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, some international situation, like zero net emission, requires a giant party to join, which requires governments to share their national resources and policies across
countries
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.
Submitted by elroivan on

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Task Response
Make sure to clearly address each part of the essay prompt and provide a balanced discussion of both views.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on providing a more cohesive structure from introduction to conclusion, including clear topic sentences and logical paragraph development.
Lexical Resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to include more precise and varied expressions, and use academic language appropriate for the task.
Grammatical Range
Pay closer attention to sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and punctuation to improve overall grammatical accuracy.
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