Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Regarding
to
where Remove the preposition
apply
the
professionals should Correct article usage
apply
starting
their Wrong verb form
start
career
, some Fix the agreement mistake
careers
people
argue that they should be working in the state where they are trained. Other
believe that experts should be given flexibility to choose their work Fix the agreement mistake
Others
country
. Although
the prior opinion have
some Verb problem
is to
extents
, I believe that Fix the agreement mistake
extent
people
with expertise should be given freedom
to choose where to work.
On one hand, It is understandable that the quota of university students in some Add an article
the freedom
major
is adjusted based on Fix the agreement mistake
majors
country
needs,
so Remove the comma
apply
that
it is important for those who received a degree from a nation to serve back and to feel the job gap. Correct word choice
apply
For instance
, the number of medical students in Indonesian universities each year are limited based on state's
need for future doctors, Correct article usage
the state's
thus
upon graduation, they are mandated to work in Indonesian Hospital for couple
Correct article usage
a couple
years
. Change preposition
of years
However
, this
policy serves
some drawbacks Verb problem
has
such
as low salary
and limited Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
chance
for self improvements for professionals.
Fix the agreement mistake
chances
On the other hand
, working in foreign countries can be challenging due to
some factors such
as language barrier
and different bureaucracy, Fix the agreement mistake
barriers
however
, it provides plenty of benefit
for both experts and the Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
country
so that
it should be allowed. Correct word choice
apply
Firstly
, by working in
abroad Change preposition
apply
people
will encounter new challenges. If managed properly, they could lead to self improvement
. Add a hyphen
self-improvement
Moreover
, a high salary that is
Wrong verb form
sent
send
back to their home countries can Wrong verb form
sent
Wrong verb form
contribute
contributes
to the state foreign exchange. In Indonesia, foreign workers contribute the highest foreign exchange.
In conclusion, though the number of experts already adjusted with Wrong verb form
contribute
number
of students enrolled in universities, working in the same Change the article
a number
the number
country
does not provide promising salary
and access to self-development. Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
Thus
, it is important to let expert people
to
choose their working Change the verb form
apply
country
as it bring
benefit both personally and nationally.Change the verb form
brings
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear development of ideas and organization. The introduction and conclusion need to be more clearly presented.
task achievement
The essay lacks clear progression and logical sequence of ideas. There are some issues with the development and presentation of ideas.
lexical resource
The essay contains a range of vocabulary, but it needs to show a higher level of precision and sophistication in word choice.
grammatical range
There are several grammatical errors, and the sentence structure is often awkward or imprecise. The essay lacks variety and complexity in the use of grammatical structures.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!