Today there is a great increase in antisocial personal behavior such as committing a crime. What are the causes of this? Who should be responsible for this problem? (crime)

In recent times, there has been a surge increase in antisocial behaviour, particularly criminal activities.

This

phenomenon can be attributed to several causes.

Firstly

, one of the main reasons is the differences between groups of people caused mainly by their financial situation. To be more specific, economic disparities and unemployment can drive

individuals

toward criminal activities as a means of survival or to attain material wealth. The lack of opportunities and financial security can lead people down a path of illegal action. Another conspicuous reason is the breakdown of family and social support systems. Dysfunctional families, lack of parental guidance, or lack of community support can result in

individuals

feeling isolated and disconnected from society.

Moreover

, the media often glorifies and normalizes criminal behaviour, making it appealing to impress

individuals

. Peer pressure from delinquent friends or social groups can push people towards criminal acts in an attempt to fit in or gain acceptance. Responsibility for addressing

this

problem should be divided among stakeholders. The government should invest in education, job creation, and social programs to reduce the impact of socioeconomic factors. Stronger family support and counselling services should be

also

available to provide guidance for

individuals

Additionally

, the media should have a responsibility to portray antisocial behaviours in a realistic and responsible manner rather than sensationalizing them. In conclusion, the increase in antisocial behaviours can be attributed to factors

such

as socioeconomic, family breakdown, and external influences

Submitted by phthaoo on Tue Nov 14 2023

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task response

Ensure that each paragraph is clearly focused on the topic. Develop the ideas and provide more specific examples to support the main points effectively.

coherence cohesion

Use a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the overall coherence of the essay. Ensure that the paragraph development is logical and easy to follow.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to include more precise and varied expressions. Introduce more sophisticated language to enhance the lexical resource.

grammatical range

Continue to demonstrate a good grasp of grammar and sentence structure. Pay attention to more complex sentence structures to further showcase grammatical range.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

237 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today there is a great increase in antisocial personal behavior such as committing a crime. What are the causes of this? Who should be responsible for this problem? (crime)

Fully explain your ideas

Parents should spend more time with their children helping them with their homework. Do you agree or disagree?

More and more people buy a wide range of household goods like television, microwave oven and rice cooker. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Employers should give their workers at least one month holiday a year as it makes them to do better at their job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?