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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays, many people prefer eating out rather than cooking at home. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #home #outweigh
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At the moment a
lot
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 of
people
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 would like to eat out rather than prepare
meals
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 at
home
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 . In my opinion, many
people
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 would like to eat out so I would rather advantage of the former view. On the one hand, many
people
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 prefer to eat out but
this
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 is not good all the
time
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 because the restaurants have got a
lot
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 of unhealthy
meals
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 and restaurants have many old products and old
meals
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 and healthy food prices are very expensive
therefore
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 everybody does not buy healthy food .They are full of harmful spices and fatty foods.
As a result
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, many persons appear with different illnesses.
This
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 is damage to our health.
On the other hand
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, we have got little
time
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 because nowadays all
people
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 are working somewhere or everyone has something important to do
therefore
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 they have got a bit of
time
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 for daily life
for instance
Linking Words
 cooking a meal at
home
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 and making dinner.
This
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 takes a
lot
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 of
time
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.Many
people
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 prefer to eat out because when
people
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 go to a restaurant they will order what they want and they have many opportunities to choose different
meals
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 and
this
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 does not have a
lot
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 of
time
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.
People
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 would like waiters to serve them. All
people
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 prefer it for these reasons. In conclusion everyone
people
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 for good eating out and every one person for comfortable. I think eating out rather than cooking at
home
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 because preparing
meals
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 at
home
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 takes a
lot
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 of
time
Use synonyms
Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on

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Introduction Clarity
Consider stating your main argument clearly in the introduction to better guide the reader.
Sentence Complexity
Use a variety of sentence structures to improve the complexity and flow of your ideas.
Paragraph Focus
Make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea, reinforcing your argument with examples or explanations.
Task Response
Revisit the task and ensure your argument directly responds to the question, weighing both advantages and disadvantages before drawing a conclusion.
Linking Phrases
To strengthen cohesion, use linking phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs.
Clear Stance
You provided a clear stance on the topic, believing the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Balanced Discussion
Your essay discusses viewpoints on both sides of the argument, contributing to a balanced discussion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenience
  • time-saving
  • social experience
  • cultural experience
  • variety
  • food choices
  • relief
  • cooking responsibilities
  • cost
  • health concerns
What to do next:
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