It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

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Due to
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the lack of passion and wanting to explore more
knowledgea
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knowledge
the
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at the
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same
time
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before getting into
university
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,
therefore
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many graduate high school students decide to take one
year
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off before entering the
university
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. I
whill
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will
shed some
loght
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light
due to
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the pros and cons
according to
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it. It is become
acceptable
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an acceptable
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reason if people want to take a gap
year
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before deciding what
university
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they prefer to get into.
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Due to the
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The
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many subjects they need to learn
in
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at
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the same
time
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back in
highschool
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high school
show examples
making
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made
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it difficult to
saw
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see
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what their actual passion and they often
struggling
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struggle
show examples
to
chose
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choose
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what major
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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fit
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fits
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them best.
Sometime
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Sometimes
show examples
, to take a
year
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off is the right answer, they can explore or even develop their knowledge and be more
focus
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focused
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on what
their
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they're
they are
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truly passionate about. From that short period of
time
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off, the impact can be seen when they
entering
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enter
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university
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, they will have
willingness
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a willingness
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to
boarden
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broaden
knowledge,
more
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be more
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competitive, and become more responsible
of
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for
show examples
what major they have
been
Wrong verb form
chosen
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choosen
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chosen
compared to others that don’t
However
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, every coin has two
side
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sides
show examples
, and despite all of the advantages of
take
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taking
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a gap
year
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before entering
collague
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colleague
college
, there are some drawbacks too.
Firstly
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, during a gap
year
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, children have to be accompanied and supervised by their parents
otherwise
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they will make it an excuse and take advantage
from
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of
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it,
for instance
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being a couch
potato
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potatoes
show examples
and
party
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partying
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with friends
everyday
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every day
show examples
.
Secondly
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,
according to
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many experiences they have gone through, they tend to forget the basic knowledge learnt in
the
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apply
show examples
high school.
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Thus
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This
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, making them have a hard
time
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and
struggling
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struggle
show examples
to
figured
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figure
show examples
out the basic concept of
subject
Add an article
the subject
a subject
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which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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needed to
undestanding
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understanding
the
collague
Correct your spelling
colleague
basic courses. In conclusion,
take
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taking
show examples
a
year
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off has several advantages and disadvantages. It
is
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apply
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actually
depend
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depends
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on one’s willingness, whether they use their
time
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to study more to find out what
their
Correct your spelling
they are
show examples
truly passionate about, or
this
Linking Words
is just an excuse to seek
happyness
Correct your spelling
happiness
rather than study to pursue
higher
Add an article
a higher
show examples
degree.
Submitted by baitynuris191 on

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Task Achievement
The essay provides a partial response to the task, but lacks clear comprehensive ideas and relevant specific examples. More focused and well-developed arguments are required to fully address the advantages and disadvantages of taking a year off before university.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay shows some logical structure and attempts to introduce and conclude the topic. However, there is a need for better coherence and cohesion in organizing ideas and linking them together more effectively. Try to use cohesive devices and provide a more structured framework for the essay.
Lexical Resource
The essay demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary and attempts to express ideas, but there is room for improvement. Utilize a wider variety of academic and precise vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource. Avoid repetitive language and aim for more precise and accurate word choice.
Grammatical Range
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are noticeable grammatical errors and inaccuracies. Work on improving sentence structures, using more complex grammar, and ensuring greater accuracy in the use of tenses, articles, and punctuation.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • work experience
  • internships
  • traveling
  • life experiences
  • personal development
  • independent
  • self-reliant
  • educational progress
  • graduation timeline
  • financial burden
  • academic momentum
  • structured academic environment
What to do next:
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