Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #work #people’s #life #success #career

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It has been frequently argued that employment plays an essential role in the journey of inhabitants,

consequently

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, if a person does not attain a satisfactory job, he might assume his life is useless. I partially agree with the statement as there are many other important things to do and the same will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.

To begin

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with, there is no doubt that inhabitants spend the majority of their time at the workplace,

subsequently

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, they should feel happy

while

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doing their job.

In other words

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, when workers feel stressed at their workplace, there is a probability that they could suffer from health problems

such

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as chronic stress.

Apart from

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this

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, from an early age, children work really hard merely to get a good source of income, so that they can enjoy the rest of their years the way they want.

For instance

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, if a person is not able to get a desired job to do, he would assume his hard work of many years from high school to university, everything was worthless.

On the other hand

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although

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workers spend one-third of their day earning for themselves or their family, still, they left with a two-thirds proportion of their time, which they could lead the way they would prefer. To put it forth, there are some individuals, who like to get involved in charity work and spend the majority of their time in the slums to help the needy.

For example

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, there are many dwellers, who have been working for organizations free of cost, in fact, they are the most happy and satisfied people.

Besides

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, in Asian countries, only one member earns in the family earns and the rest everyone stays home and does their chores.

Therefore

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, it would be wrong to say, everyone`s journey is worthless, if they are not doing paid jobs. In conclusion, in

this

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era, a successful career is considered an essential part of life as

that is

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the only dream a child initiates to think about from an early age.

However

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, there are a plethora of dwellers in the world, who have been enjoying their lives, yet, they do not have any good careers.

Submitted by mizuho on Thu Nov 16 2023

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Introduction and Conclusion Development

Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are both fully developed and clearly state your stance on the issue. A weak or absent introduction/conclusion can severely impact the overall effectiveness of the essay.

Logical Development and Support

Improve the logical flow of ideas and ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic that is developed logically and supported by appropriate examples.

Task Response

Focus on fully responding to the task by more directly addressing the extent to which you agree or disagree with the given statement, and provide a balanced discussion that covers all aspects of the prompt.

Idea Development and Clarity

Enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas by further developing your arguments and providing more detailed examples where applicable.

Use of Examples

Incorporate relevant examples that directly support your main points and position on the topic to strengthen your argument.

16
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

361 words

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Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Caring for children is important in any society. All parents should be required to take childcare courses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some say that it would be better if the majority of employees worked from home instead of travelling to a workplace every day. Do you think the advantages of working from home outweigh the disadvantages?

Some companies give a higher salary to CEO than the common employees. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some cities ban private cars from entering the centre and force people to use bicycles and buses. Do the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that the government should spend more money taking care of elderly people while others think that government spending should be spent more on the education of young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.