Adult youths are often called up for working development of communities. Some people say that they should be paid other say that they should not be pair. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Young
people
often obtain a calling up for
Change preposition
to
contributiion
Correct your spelling
contribute
communities'
development. I strongly believe Change preposition
to communities'
this
case in
Change preposition
on
one
Correct article usage
the one
hand
brings positive impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
such
as raising awareness
in society
and training their capabilities social, but in
Change preposition
on
another
Correct determiner usage
the
hand
, it Correct word choice
other hand
also
has negative impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
such
as make
youth be exploited illegally without obtaining any funding.
One Wrong verb form
making
hand
, deploying young people
without any wages to contribute in
Change preposition
to
commnities
Correct your spelling
communities
it
makes them Correct pronoun usage
apply
raising
Wrong verb form
raise
awareness
in society
and practising
their social skills. Nowadays young Wrong verb form
practise
people
have huge awareness
because involving
themselves in Wrong verb form
they involve
communities
that run in crucial field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
such
as education, climate change, biotechnology
through Correct word choice
and biotechnology
volunteer
activity. Indirectly, it grows the feeling of how important role
Correct article usage
the role
these
Change preposition
of these
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
for
Add a missing verb
is for
progress
of the country and Add an article
the progress
society
. At
the middle of the Change preposition
In
volunteer
program
, young people
have to discuss, collaborate, coordinate and communicate not only with the member
of the Fix the agreement mistake
members
communities
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
with the public in order to launch their planned program
in volunteer
activity which it
can train their social skills
On another Correct pronoun usage
apply
hand
, without any funding
it can be included in kind of activity Add a comma
funding,
illegally
exploitation of young Change the word
illegal
people
. Through volunteer
, many of CEOs
Correct article usage
the CEOs
communities
recruited young people
to look for human resources who can help them to held
their planned Change the verb
hold
program
. In some cases, sometimes the CEOs take advantage of this
condition arbitrarily
Change preposition
by arbitrarily
give
many Wrong verb form
giving
of
Change preposition
apply
job
or Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
occupation
Fix the agreement mistake
occupations
for
young Change preposition
to
people
who have been recruited. Moreover
, eventhough
the CEOs promise certificate Correct your spelling
even though
contribution
for recruited Fix the agreement mistake
contributions
person
, it seems not enough. Because the recruited young have given time, money and others to make their Fix the agreement mistake
people
program
launched. The recruited young have to get more appreciation than certificate
Change the noun form
certificates
such
as reward
, Fix the agreement mistake
rewards
wage
or free training Fix the agreement mistake
wages
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
in particular
crucial skills.
In conclusion, involving youth for
Change preposition
in
working
development of Correct article usage
the working
communities
it
can Correct pronoun usage
apply
brings
pros and cons Change the verb form
bring
suc
as raising Correct your spelling
such
awareness
in society
and training their capabilities social, but in another hand
, it also
has negative impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
such
as make
youth Wrong verb form
making
be
exploited illegally without obtaining any funding.Unnecessary verb
apply
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coherence cohesion
Please ensure your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. While the main ideas are present, they could be better organized. Use linking words effectively.
task achievement
Ensure you are responding directly to the question's prompt. Address both viewpoints and give your own opinion more clearly. Develop each point with specific information or examples.
lexical resource
Enhance your lexical resource by using a broader range of vocabulary and synonyms to avoid repetition. Be careful with word choice to maintain precision and appropriateness.
grammatical range
Work on grammatical range by varying your sentence structures. Use complex sentences and demonstrate control over grammar and punctuation.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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