The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual Income in 2007, 2011 end 2015. Summarise the Information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

#households #income #summarise #information #features #comparisons

People have different views about the types of fields that

students

should learn at the

university

while

the

students

are expected to explore other

subjects

, some believe that focusing only on the qualification lessons needed is the foremost thing. From my perspective, I believe that working extra on both will effectively have beneficial impacts. Some additional lessons obtained by

University

Students

help them work better at their main

subjects

This

is because they learn and get extra information which indirectly affects their performance in the class.

In other words

, when the

students

joined outside class they were one step ahead of their friends.

This

eventually resulted in having more insights and chances to achieve a high grade or even becoming the best

students

. On the other side, for those who depend on

qualification

Fix the agreement mistake

qualifications

show examples

as the major purpose of studying will

also

have a positive impact as many companies require that as the main requirement for applying for jobs.

Furthermore

, they are who focus on their

subjects

only on campus will make them stay focused, so they will graduate on time and get a job as soon as possible. In the end, having a job is the paramount reason behind entering

university

. In conclusion,

it is clear that

taking the opportunity to study other

subjects

from the main

subjects

at the

university

is a positive activity,

However

, focusing only

getting

Change preposition

on getting

show examples

a certificate for qualification

also

has a great impact on future accupation.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Fri Nov 17 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Introduction: The introduction is missing.

▼

Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words students, university, subjects with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

241 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

household distribution
income brackets
annual income
percentage change
trend analysis
income group
significant increase/decrease
steady growth/decline
fluctuations
compared to
in contrast
notably
median income
poverty line
economic factors

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