IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some students take one year off between finishing school and going to university in order to travel or to work do you think advantags outweigh vote disadvantages

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While
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 the importance of higher education is undeniable, the debate over the value of a
one
Use synonyms
-year break between school and university persists.
This
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 break, whether filled with work or travel, can lead to increased maturity and experience, positively influencing the decision-making process when choosing a profession and a place to pursue a degree.
To begin
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 with, as for the disadvantage of taking
one
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 year off, the ability to study will be considered.
In other words
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, after a long period of not studying, students may not have any will to consume study materials, prepare for exams, and attend lectures.
Furthermore
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, in most cases, students have to spend days and nights to be ready for knowledge assessments;
however
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, a working schedule consists of solely 40 hours per week.
For instance
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, I lost the performance of absorbing new materials because I worked for many years before I decided to prepare for the IELTS exam.
As a result
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, I, like many others, have to spend more time studying after the breaks.
On the other hand
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,
one
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 year of changing the way of living could make an individual more mature.
This
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 is because a former student will know the rules of work and understand the adulthood batter. Despite much advice parents may give youngsters, the actual experience intrinsically forms the correct perception of the world.
For example
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, in the US, many teenagers work after school, receiving the essential expertise to make conscious decisions about getting a higher education.
In contrast
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, if horizon and practice were not important, people would only make correct choices;
however
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, we can observe many cases when students change professions many times. In conclusion, I maintain that the potential negative aspects of a study gap,
such
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 as a decrease in performance
due to
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 relaxation, are outweighed by the positive effects. These positive effects,
such
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 as broadening
one
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's horizons and gaining maturity in the workforce, are long-term benefits that can significantly impact
one
Use synonyms
's future success.

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relevant specific examples
Try to include more specific and varied examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
logical structure
Consider refining your transitions between paragraphs for smoother flow. This can enhance the overall coherence of your essay.
complete response
Make sure to address all aspects of the task prompt in detail. Expanding on some points could provide a more thorough response.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly outlines the topic and provides a balanced view of the debate.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarises the main points and offers a clear position on the issue.
complete response
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages, offering a balanced perspective.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas presented are generally clear and well-articulated.
logical structure
There is a logical structure to the essay, and paragraphs are well-organized.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gap year
  • Life experiences
  • Personal growth
  • Independence
  • Resume enhancement
  • Practical skills
  • Cultural awareness
  • Global perspective
  • Academic burnout
  • Renewed energy
  • Financial savings
  • Student loans
  • Skillset
  • Workforce
  • Self-discovery
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