Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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One of the social concerns today relates to transport safety.
While
it is often argued that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing circulation accidents. Others suggest that some different methods would be more effective in improving road safety. In my point of view, I admit that strict punishment for traffic offences is the point to decrease movement accidents. On the one hand, it is argued that transit violators should be punished heavily to avoid transport fortune.
Firstly
, awareness from education costs an amount of time to be formed and changed.
However
, money or serious penalisation effect immediately.
For example
, A person who drinks alcohol before driving will be punished at a high and serious cost,
this
creates a fear not to break the rules and doesn’t have the courage to reiterate.
Secondly
, all of the penalties may be transferred into the state budget and support national facilities.
On the other hand
, it is strongly believed by others that a few other methods would be suitable for developing route security. People often have
this
opinion because a number of measures provide a straightforward but effective advantage. A particularly good example here is intelligent transportation systems.
This
provides a quick and precise system of cameras, emergency supports and accident control. A second point is that people who enter traffic will feel more comfortable rather than being punished. In conclusion, it is commonly thought that transportation disasters must be reduced by serious punishment for people who participate in travel. Meanwhile, others assume that road protection should be looked up effectively by various techniques. Personally, I tend to believe that hard chastisement will be a golden key to decreasing transit accidents.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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structure
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion which are essential components of the structure. Additionally, while the essay does tackle the task, there is room for a more nuanced discussion and the inclusion of more specific examples to support each viewpoint.
support
Main points could have been better supported with specific examples or clearer explanations to strengthen your arguments. Ensure the evidence you provide directly supports your point of view and consider providing concrete examples from real-life situations or credible sources.
coherence
The coherence of the essay suffers due to a lack of clear and logical transitions between points and ideas. Sentences should flow naturally, and paragraphs should be clearly structured around a single main idea. Consider using linking words and phrases to clarify the relationships between sentences and ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deterrent
  • repeat offenses
  • infrastructure improvements
  • public awareness campaigns
  • reckless driving
  • traffic management technologies
  • intelligent traffic lights
  • speed cameras
  • public transportation
  • minimize
  • enhance safety
  • allocate funds
  • road signs
  • road safety
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