.What do you believe are your personal strengths ?

#strengths

My greatest strengths are self-motivation, time management and organisation skills. I work well under pressure and enjoy helping co-workers get daily tasks completed. I gained these skills when I worked at the Gynecology/Obstetric department in a Municipal Hospital in Japan as a Midwife and Nurse,

therefore

I am confident and able to work efficiently and effectively.

Submitted by slowloris4444 on Sat Nov 18 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure

Your essay's structure appears somewhat incoherent and lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, which are essential for guiding the reader through your points. Consider adding an opening sentence that introduces the main topic and a closing sentence or paragraph that summarizes your key points and reflects on them.

coherence

To improve coherence, ensure that your ideas are logically organized and clearly linked. Use connective words and phrases to show the relationships between your sentences and paragraphs.

details and examples

For task achievement, it's crucial to expand on your ideas and provide more details and examples to fully address the question. You've made assertions about your strengths, but there should be more elaboration and concrete examples demonstrating how these strengths have benefited you or others in your work.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

56 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.
An increasing number of married couples around the world choosing to remain childless. The main benefits to be child-free for couples are that they can focus on their careers and have more time for themselves. The main drawbacks are that they could not fit into their peers’ group and have no one to look after them when they get old.
5
band
Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
Some people believe that exercise is vital for good health whereas others think that well-balanced diet is more essential. In this essay, I discuss both views and give my own opinion.
6
band
Some people think that people should be given the right to use freshwater as they like. Others believe governments should strictly control the use of freshwater. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is debatable whether the government should announce the law to manage the consumption of freshwater or allow residents to use it freely. From my perspective, both opinions are convincing to a certain extent, but I still find the former more reasonable. The following paragraphs would shed light on my viewpoint.
5.5
band
Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level. However, some says that individuals should pay for their university education. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.
While some consider that governments must bear the cost of education for everyone at every level, others believe that higher education expenses must be borne by the individual themselves. I agree with the latter statement and would give examples in support of it along with discussing both viewpoints in the coming paragraphs.
4
band
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
Getting a well-paid position for people over 50 has been a cause of concern for some time. Although these people have extensive experience, employers often do not wish to hire them. This seems to be clear that this development has specific problems, which need to be resolved in the nearest future. First problem, which seems to me to be the most important one, is that too often highly skilled workers in their 50s and 60s suffer from discrimination because they have, as it is usually said, to...

.What do you believe are your personal strengths ?

Include an introduction and conclusion

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people think that people should be given the right to use freshwater as they like. Others believe governments should strictly control the use of freshwater. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level. However, some says that individuals should pay for their university education. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?